I am on the verge of just going to a homeless shelter because I am living with my “sister” who is over 21 years old and feels the need to bully and demean others verbally. She has been doing this since I was in middle school and even younger. When I was younger she would climb on top of me and smack me and even hit me and public. And I did nothing because I was a defenseless young girl who barely even spoke. Her and my cousin would gang up on me and bully me, when all I wanted to do was be accepted. I never wanted to fight or get bullied being younger. But they continued to attack me because I was so weak and defenseless. So I of course never said anything and did not speak out about the abuse. Until one day we were driving back home, I told my family that my cousin has been verbally abusing me and speaking negative words under her breath about me so only I could hear it, because she knew I was the only one who could hear it.

Of course my family did not give a shit as they just laughed and said, my cousin is just”aggressive” sometimes. And it was actually my fault because I am the disrespectful one , even though I was completely mute. So I had to deal with that abuse and eventually ended up with chronic depression and bad insomnia. I had to ride with the person who abused me everyday to school because I had no other choice and no one believed me. Then when I was in school I wrote a suicide note that my friend told the teacher and so on…

Anyways I still have to live with the sister who abused me verbally and physically. And of course I do not want to be around her, I had a therapist and a physiologist who diagnosed me with my illness, and I need to talk to them about having autism. I do not want to be around her because I do not feel comfortable and now she has her boyfriend here who has no job and my mom thinks that is ok. Also my mom of course does not care as I told her and even wrote her a ESSAY about the trauma and abuse I went through and she still does not care. My family has a history of abuse and this disgust me.

Anyways I had been trying to move for a month now, and the problem is I have no car because I got into a accident. And there are no buses where I live, and I had some tours but wasn’t able to go. what do i do! please help if you can