Home→Forums→Tough Times→It’s always something..is it ever “nothing”?
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Helcat.
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August 19, 2024 at 7:06 pm #436389
Laven
ParticipantFoster mom was admitted into the hospital and will have to have major surgery due to fluid around heart, and spend a few days there.
I saw on her chart online that the doctor discussed a dnr and incubation options if her heart were to stop…but she agreed that she would like to be resuscitated if possible.
I feel like she may not make it.
Everyday, I watch her decline in many ways and it’s tough seeing her like that.I don’t know what would happen….if I lost her…especially in a tragic way..jeopardizing her peace..but it’s all tragic…for everyone…all stages of life..
Just today…she looked at me very defeated, deflated, and depressed and said that she’s old and probably doesn’t have much time left to live.
There was such terrible confusion about the seriousness of her condition and when she should go to the hospital being relayed differently by her doctor’s. It was terrifying and unnerving for she, I, and the rest of her family. One said she’ll be fine and it can wait until next week that it’s nothing serious, another said that she needs to be admitted to the hospital asap.
Eventually she was told to go to the hospital asap.She’s been in there 3 days now, and just had surgery today to place a pericardial drain. The chart online is saying more fluid than normal is being collected in the bag. I found out that could be due to traumas and unrelated serious health issues…and that’s a very dangerous thing.
Who knows what will happen. Something deep inside of me is telling me that she’s not coming home.
I remembered about a month before someone around where I reside passed…He sat parked in his car drinking and thinking for many hours..
One time, I helped him into his house because he was too intoxicated to open his door. Luckily his wife was there..
I hope that she was kind to him during those days.I feel like I’m losing a never ending battle…
August 19, 2024 at 7:13 pm #436390anita
ParticipantDear Laven:
I wish your foster mother healing and recovery, physically and emotionally. I wish you strength and courage!
anita
August 20, 2024 at 8:30 pm #436419Tommy
ParticipantAfter seeing what the doctors are willing to do to a person just to save their life, the shock of .. of what was done to my mom and the suffering she went thru, My family (brothers and wives and my father) chose DNR. It may sound insensitive and crude. But, we saw it as a better option. My mom had dementia. So, she didn’t really know who she was nor who all the people visiting her were. My wife spent a lot of time soothing her with words of her getting better. It hurt when she passed. But, it also felt like this was another stage of life. Soon it will be my turn. That ought to make you happy??
Well, I do wish your mom will be better soon. Hope you are doing well, too.
August 20, 2024 at 8:33 pm #436420Tommy
ParticipantOh, I forgot to mention, my mom did not speak English very well. And the dementia made English even more difficult for her. She couldn’t communicate her feelings or her needs to the staff. Towards the end, she spent more time sleeping than awake.
August 21, 2024 at 8:02 am #436444Helcat
ParticipantHi Laven
I’m sorry to hear that your foster mom has been in hospital. I hope the surgery goes well and she gets to go home. It must be really hard for you and everyone else. Please remember to take care of yourself. She is in good hands with the doctors and nurses. This is a lot of stress and it is easy to forget about taking care of yourself during stressful times.
Love and best wishes! ❤️🙏
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