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Learning self love

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  • October 26, 2015 at 3:12 pm #86139
    Jaslyn
    Participant

    Dear Chris,

    Thank you for this! I really valued your thoughts on this subject as I know that I definitely struggle with self love and self care. There’s this quote that I really like that helps to remind me to care for myself: Be gentle with yourself. Something so simple yet so important.

    I know that something that really helps me is to write out what I’m thankful for in my life and why I’m proud of myself that day (like being able to accomplish certain tasks or a reminder about having inner strength).

    I also really like this article and hope that you may find it useful too: http://www.thefeministwire.com/2014/04/self-love-and-self-care/

    Blessings
    -Jaslyn

    October 26, 2015 at 5:43 pm #86141
    jock
    Participant

    I liked to beat myself up for my mistakes

    I just reread the original post and noticed this. The fact that you (we) liked to beat yourself(ourselves)up.
    That’s interesting isn’t it. The fact that part of us gets pleasure out of self-recriminations. Otherwise why would we do it?
    Part of us gets reward for the abuse and then it becomes a habit.
    So actually we sometimes identify with the internal bully instead of the victim part of us.

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 6 months ago by jock.
    October 26, 2015 at 6:00 pm #86147
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Perfectly stated Jack. I must repeat it:

    “Part of us gets pleasure out of self-recriminations. Otherwise why would we do it?
    Part of us gets reward for the abuse and then it becomes a habit.
    So actually we sometimes identify with the internal bully instead of the victim part of us.”

    Excellent quote for a new thread, says I.

    anita

    October 27, 2015 at 12:04 am #86174
    jock
    Participant

    thanks anita
    Also I’d like to add that it is all done unconsciously. We are not aware of all the internal politics that goes on , between out inner selves. One second I’m berating myself for getting fat, the next minute an inner self takes the bullet for the rest of the team. feeling “ouch! Not again!” Then other members want to have their say.I’m continually switching from bully, insulter, victim, ally of bully, ally of victim, fence-sitter, umpire, adult, child, Republican, Democrat, male, female, etecera, etcetera. Actually I think in reality there is a cast of a 1000 inner selves, because we can only access a small part of the unconscious. Small wonder it is so hard to find peace of mind and self-love!

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 6 months ago by jock.
    October 27, 2015 at 7:36 am #86194
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear jack:

    What inner self put together the board meetings? Adam the Adult, was it? Someone else too, I forgot… what if ONE inner self conducts board meetings on a regular basis, an inner self, adam perhaps who you bring up consciously and identify with him consciously, could be one you make up today that is most suited for the job and he becomes the dominant one, consciously, deliberately…

    anita

    October 27, 2015 at 9:11 am #86206
    jock
    Participant

    yes good suggestion anita

    October 27, 2015 at 9:18 am #86210
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Jack: I remember now: Chairman Chuck it was. I like the idea of a new chairman though, one you will come up with now, as the more evolved person that you are now, following your great invention, Inner Selves Therapy, which for me is way, way more than entertainment.
    anita

    October 27, 2015 at 9:23 am #86212
    jock
    Participant

    IST is all yours. I got burnt out already on those board meetings. Writing them out anyway. You can take sole ownership.

    October 27, 2015 at 10:46 am #86229
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Hmmm… sole ownership, you say. Well, maybe you will go back to it someday. Maybe you are temporarily burnt out. I am not taking ownership of IST yet.

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