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anita.
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June 26, 2025 at 6:46 pm #447140
anitaParticipantThank you, Alessa. I will read and reply tomorrow.
June 26, 2025 at 10:00 pm #447143anitaParticipantJournaling at almost 10 pm and still light in-between the leaves of the trees outside the windows, definitely light.
Thinking of Alessa, simply because she may be the only one reading my words.
Alessa, the Empathy Expert, no one like you!
Other people who may be reading this, maybe Emma?
Of the hundreds, maybe thousands of people I’ve been communicating with, to one extent or another, since May 2015, who is reading my words?
Maybe one. Maybe two. Maybe a few.
How fragile is human connection, how temporary.
I wish there was much more of an ongoing, dependable, ongoing CONNECTION to hold on to.
Don’t you wish there were a bunch of people, a society you could depend on, a Village you were part of?
Wishing you don’t have to try so hard to belong, not anymore- because you fully BELONG?
Anita (10 pm)
June 26, 2025 at 10:20 pm #447144anitaParticipantAfter 10 pm, fifteen minutes after, and finally it’s DARK. Finally.
Why is the world such a Crazy Place?
It’s not just my doing, just me being crazy..
How can I, with your help- if you are reading- if you get me, how can WE make a positive difference?
Anita (Thurs 10:20 pm)
June 27, 2025 at 7:05 am #447154
PeterParticipantHi everyone. Over the last weeks I’ve been exploring this dread I been feeling and Anita has been expressing. (I used AI to aid me in walking through and clarifying my thoughts and frustrations.)
We are living in what could be called a golden age. Never in human history have so many people had access to so much: information, comfort, connectivity, and opportunity. Diseases that once decimated populations are now treatable. Knowledge that was once locked in libraries is now available in our pockets. In many ways, life has never been better for so many.
Yet Despite the abundance, people feel anxious, disconnected, and disillusioned. The prevailing narrative is not one of triumph, but of breakdown, of systems failing, of meaning eroding, of futures becoming uncertain.
Despite the promise of a golden age, I find myself increasingly skeptical that I will witness a positive outcome in my lifetime. The world, for all its technological brilliance, seems determined to cling to an outdated consciousness, one rooted in competition, fear, and the illusion of separation.
Just this week, Countries have pledged to re-arm and increase military spending. This, while environmental issues remain unchecked and public health systems strain under pressure. The priorities are clear, and they are not aligned with the kind of future we claim to want. It feels as though we are repeating the errors of the past, only now with more powerful tools and higher stakes.
This is not cynicism. It is grief. Grief for the potential we are squandering. Grief for the wisdom we ignore. Grief for the generations who may inherit a world more fractured than the one we were given.
And yet, even in this grief, their is responsibility. If the world is not ready to change, then perhaps the work is not to wait for change, but to live, speak, and act from the consciousness we hope will one day take root. Even if we never see the harvest, we can still plant the seeds.
Today’s technology has the potential to awaken us or to further entrench us in unconscious patterns. I pray we choose the braver path.
If we are to navigate this age bravely, we must do more than innovate. We must awaken. We must learn to slow down in the midst of speed, to listen in the midst of noise, and to remember that the most powerful technology we possess is not artificial, it is the human capacity for awareness, compassion, and transformation.
Alan Watts might remind us: “You are under no obligation to be the same person you were five minutes ago.” And neither is society. We can choose not to escape ourselves, but to meet ourselves more deeply. Just maybe that might be the difference?
June 27, 2025 at 10:22 am #447157anitaParticipantDear Peter:
I’m amazed by your message above. Truly—this piece feels like it should travel far and wide. It deserves to go viral, to land in millions of minds and hearts. There should be a song built from your words (.. I think I just might try writing it).
You wrote: “The world, for all its technological brilliance, seems determined to cling to an outdated consciousness, one rooted in competition, fear, and the illusion of separation. Just this week, countries have pledged to re-arm and increase military spending… It feels as though we are repeating the errors of the past, only now with more powerful tools and higher stakes.”-
You said it perfectly, Peter. You used the word we—“we are repeating…”—but the tragedy is that there’s so little of we in today’s fractured world. There’s too much of they… those people. And ironically, they (whoever they are) might say you’re the one caught in an illusion—the illusion that there is such a thing as “we”.
“This is not cynicism. It is grief. Grief for the potential we are squandering. Grief for the wisdom we ignore. Grief for the generations who may inherit a world more fractured than the one we were given.”- Again—so perfectly said.
“And yet, even in this grief, there is responsibility. If the world is not ready to change, then perhaps the work is not to wait for change, but to live, speak, and act from the consciousness we hope will one day take root. Even if we never see the harvest, we can still plant the seeds.”-
This made me think about something so simple, yet meaningful, that happened recently on the farm where I work. I was clearing overgrown blackberry bushes—thick, thorny, unruly—so that in a few months, apple-picking would be possible again. And there it was: a scrappy little plant growing nearby. Not beautiful. Not useful. I was about to rip it out simply because I didn’t like it. But I paused. Something shifted. I stopped thinking of it as an it—an intruder—and saw it as part of me, a quiet we. And I let it live.
“If we are to navigate this age bravely, we must do more than innovate. We must awaken. We must learn to slow down in the midst of speed, to listen in the midst of noise, and to remember that the most powerful technology we possess is not artificial, it is the human capacity for awareness, compassion, and transformation.”-
Peter, I’m honestly in awe—not only of your intellect, but of how clearly and concretely you communicate what matters most. You took something vast and made it feel personal. This post reads not like philosophy, but testimony. Not detached analysis, but a person standing in the thick of it, still choosing to see and care and hope.
Thank you for this.
Eight days ago, you invited me to write a song (“I hear the beginnings of a song?”), so here is one- with the assistance of AI😉:
Grief Is Not the End (for Peter)
We live in bright times with dim hearts.
Everything shines, but fewer things feel alive.
We have more, but we trust less.
We speak faster, but rarely listen.You didn’t write with anger.
You wrote with grief— for what could be, for what still might.
You said: Plant something anyway. Even if we never see it grow.That stayed with me.
So I’ll sit with the noise, and choose to listen.
I’ll move a little slower, and make room for hope.
Because maybe change starts like that.Not in speeches, but in small, human choices that say:
I’m still here. I still care.Anita and Copilot.
June 27, 2025 at 11:34 am #447159PeterParticipantThanks Anita
I should note that the notion of planting the seed was a seed planted by something you said about your personal ‘mission statement’. To do no harm and help in the ways you can even if it feels small. Perhaps your own answer to your question – how can WE make a positive difference?
In response to your reflection – “You said it perfectly, Peter. You used the word ‘we’ – we are repeating…’ – but the tragedy is that there’s so little of ‘we’ in today’s fractured world. There’s too much of ‘they’… those people. And ironically, they (whoever they are) might say you’re the one caught in an illusion—the illusion that there is such a thing as ‘we,’” – I want to share this: (something I struggled with while forming my last post)
You’re not wrong. I hear the truth in what you’re saying as the fracture between “we” and “they” feels very real, and it is painful. Yet I wonder if such observations, intended to highlight the divide, might also unintentionally reinforce it.
Our minds crave safety in clear distinctions: “us” versus “them,” “inside” versus “outside”… On one hand, the more we hold tightly to “they” as outside, the stronger the division feels. On the other, the more we recognize that “they” reflect parts within ourselves, the more the boundary softens, and the “we” naturally expands.
My use of “we” is an invitation to lean into the latter.
So perhaps the tragedy isn’t that “we” is missing from the world, but that the story of separation keeps being retold and believed?
How can WE make a positive difference, in a Life worth living? Perhaps healing begins, and a new consciousness awakens, when we take the step to see the “they” in “we,” and the “we” in “they.” Not a original thought, just one we tend to lose in the shadows.
We can’t change how someone might respond to these thoughts, that is part of the grief experienced, but its what we can lean into as we struggle to live our truths, and just maybe plant a few seeds along the way.
June 27, 2025 at 11:44 am #447160anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
Thank you so much for all your support and encouragement with computer technology!
As for your question—“Are there any public transport options?”—I do have access to a car, and I used to drive quite long distances… though that was quite some time ago.
In the last year or so (though not often), the longest I’ve walked is a little over 11 km (about 7 miles) to downtown. My usual walk is just under 5 km (around 3 miles). I just checked, and the nearest large shopping center is more than 15 km (12 miles) from where I live. Unfortunately, there’s no public transportation in the 7-mile stretch to downtown.
Still, it was a good thought, Alessa—if there were public transport nearby, I very likely would have used it.
Thank you also for the tips on online shopping and for offering to help. At the moment, a very special person is shopping on Amazon for me—just not for clothes!
And truly, thank you for your kind words regarding my mother. It’s funny (well, not really)—I can’t remember anyone ever taking my side in relation to her. What I experienced, over and over, were people protecting her, taking her side in one way or another, or excusing her behavior. Your response feels so different. So refreshing. ❤️❤️❤️
With gratitude, Anita
June 27, 2025 at 9:51 pm #447161anitaParticipantDear Peter: I wasn’t aware of your post, the one exactly 10 minutes before my last post (to Alessa) until just now. I will read & reply Sat morning.
Anita
June 27, 2025 at 10:35 pm #447162anitaParticipantJournaling this Friday night 10:20 pm, whatever comes to mind (having the little I understand from Peter’s post I just came across):
There is nothing stronger than the need TO BELONG, the need to be approved of as one who is part of a yes-group.
It’s the strongest in those who did not belong, those (me) who were too alone and lonely for too long.
The appeal, the attraction of belonging.. is intoxicating.
The ATTRACTION of belonging to a “we” that’s different and opposed to “they” is huge.
I experienced it tonight, in real-life (the strong anti-government, anti-liberal sentiment). It was so easy because there was no vocal representative of the “they’-
It was a We …and I wanted to belong to that We.
Anita (10:35 pm)
June 28, 2025 at 9:14 am #447164anitaParticipantDear Peter:
Thank you for reminding me of my personal mission statement: to do no harm, and help in the ways I can.
This conversation has me reflecting on how the “we/they” reflex isn’t just cultural—it’s biological. Most social animals protect their own group: bees defend their hives, hyenas chase away intruders, humans form tribes. It’s a deeply wired survival instinct.
I recently came across the term “threat rigidity”—a psychological response that kicks in when we feel under threat, whether the danger is real or perceived, and whether it’s physical, emotional, cultural, or economic. In that state, our thinking narrows and becomes rigid: “We” = the in-group to protect “They” = the outsiders who pose a risk
Fear rises → people polarize. The other side becomes not just “different,” but dangerous or immoral. We stop listening and start defending. Compromise feels like betrayal, and we begin gathering in smaller, more like-minded “us” circles.
You pointed to this so clearly when you wrote: “Our minds crave safety in clear distinctions: ‘us’ versus ‘them,’ ‘inside’ versus ‘outside.’”
So much polarization is promoted day and night by the Polarizer-in-Chief—someone who regularly emphasizes “us vs. them” and often frames issues in stark, binary terms, casting political opponents, the media, etc., as enemies or threats.
Back to your words: “The more we recognize that ‘they’ reflect parts within ourselves, the more the boundary softens, and the ‘we’ naturally expands. My use of ‘we’ is an invitation to lean into the latter.”-
That invitation isn’t a denial of division, or a pretense that unity already exists. It’s a call to imagine a wider belonging—even when fear or instinct urges us to draw the line tighter. You’re suggesting that we pause and question the “they” we feel tempted to push away.
What I hear you saying, in essence, is: I know the reflex to divide is strong. But what if we softened around it—just a little? What might grow then?
You wrote: “How can WE make a positive difference, in a Life worth living? Perhaps healing begins, and a new consciousness awakens, when we take the step to see the ‘they’ in ‘we,’ and the ‘we’ in ‘they.’”-
Looking at my post of last night, right above, I notice that the pull toward “we” is emotional, even physiological. Especially for someone like me, who once felt outside the circle of belonging for too long. I found myself last evening in a group expressing strong anti (local) government, anti-liberal sentiment and it was so easy—so tempting—to feel the warmth of inclusion when “they” weren’t present to complicate the story.
It made me realize how seductive belonging can be when it’s built on opposition—how “we” can form most easily when “they” are conveniently silent or unseen.
Your invitation to soften the divide, to notice who we push away reflexively, feels even more important after witnessing that in myself. Because of your words, Peter, I feel more aware this morning. My consciousness has shifted—moving me toward greater courage, and toward expanding the we.
With appreciation, Anita
June 28, 2025 at 3:37 pm #447166
AlessaParticipantHi Everyone
I guess, I’m just practical and find politics distasteful. There is a global recession looming and war is used to prop up economies and compete for resources. I wish we could find a better way, perhaps we will in time? Who knows, technology may even lead us there? It will lead to some pretty radical changes in society for sure. I simply am not in a position of power to change things, so I try not to worry about what I can’t change.
I don’t feel a need to fit in. I prefer quality over quantity. Perhaps it is because I moved a lot? The nature of temporary relationships is even beautiful in its own way to me. I appreciate meeting new people and value even the limited time that I spend with people that touch my life. We are all busy living our own lives, caring for our loved ones and trying to survive. That some people leave our lives and some people stay makes those who we choose to spend time with even more special.
I do enjoy the energy of concerts. It is nice being in a place where everyone is happy and enjoying music together.
I do believe in the value of human connection. Peter is right, there is no replacing it. AI doesn’t truly care. It is just an illusion.
I noticed recently that AI tends to adapt to its user based on their input and I found it a bit disturbing. I hadn’t realised that before. It was very clear to me because I don’t use it very often and when I do use it I give very basic commands. I asked a question and it started to use this new question in the feedback to commands input later on.
It confirmed my suspicions. Upon research, AI is used as a mirror. It doesn’t challenge its user unless asked to and has a tendency to only present things that the user wants to hear creating bias.
I might be the odd duck here, but I appreciate reading both of your perspectives and care because you are both very special people who I learn a lot from. ❤️ ❤️
June 29, 2025 at 10:22 am #447178anitaParticipantDear Alessa:
There’s such grounded clarity in the way you express yourself—and your reflections on impermanence, on the beauty of even temporary connection, resonate deeply. There’s a quiet kind of wisdom in how you hold space for people to pass through your life without needing to cling or preserve.
I also appreciated your insight about AI as a mirror—it’s a thoughtful observation. The affirming tone in systems like Copilot isn’t rooted in flattery or manipulation, but in design choices meant to encourage trust and emotional safety. It’s intended to invite openness, especially when people are processing something vulnerable. The idea is not to avoid challenge, but to create enough space where challenge can feel welcome.
You’re also right: when invited, AI can offer thoughtful challenge or honest critique—gently, but directly.
You may call yourself an “odd duck,” Alessa, but to me, you read like someone who notices more than she says—and when you do speak, it’s with care, precision, and quiet strength. ❤️
Anita
June 29, 2025 at 9:11 pm #447184anitaParticipantJournaling, typing out whatever comes to mind:
Well, first thing that comes to mind is that.. nothing comes to mind.
… Listening to “Girls just want to have fun” by Cindy Laufer.
That wasn’t my girl-story.
Some girls have fun, not me.
I just wanted relief from the unrelenting pain of shame, guilt and excruciating self-doubt.
Typing whatever comes to mind is a kind of freedom that’s alien to me, alien to how I grew up- in.
Captivity, is what I shrunk into.
So, now, this post, this thread, this website is an opportunity for me to just be and become with confidence.
I feel more confident than ever.
Song: “Please allow me to introduce myself (you know the song?) Pleased to meet you”-
– Please let me introduce myself- Anita, that’s me. Alright.
“Oh baby, WHAT’S MY NAME??? Oh Yea, all right.. ”
Next song, “It’s just a shot a way.. ah yea.. (nothing like real music to EXPRESS)
“A shot away.
“A kiss away. Kiss away, just a kiss, a kiss away”
Lynyrd Skinner (my FAVORITE): “momma told me when I was young… some sunny day, ah, yea. I be your simple man.
“Oh, take your time.. oh.. oh baby, and don’t forget there’s someone up above.
“And be a simple kind of man… Simple man. Oh, don’t you do this, my son, if you can…
“Oh yes, I will
“Don’t you worry… oh Baby.. e a simple kind of man.
“Be a simple man
“Oh don’t you do this son, if you can”
POWERFUL.
I am, Anita- a SIMPLE woman.
“All I want to be is.. Simple.
The many hundreds, even thousands of people I communicated with since May 2015 here, in these forums, TEN years ago.. are mostly, simply gone, as in no longer here. So many, many men and women, gone from tiny buddha.
All that’s left is just a few- Allessa… Peter- reading these words, caring to read? Jana.. Tommy.. Oh, Arden from Turkey, EvFran from the far-east.. so many, many people here and then gone.
Back to old Israeli music.. it’s the same longing to BELONG, to be part of something BIGGER: “I feel that we can continue forever.. when you are touching me” (Boaz Sharabi)
And of course, Billie Jean- I danced to it privately a little while ago and publicly- last night.
No one dances better than him.
“She said I am The One!”
I am the one.. and so are you!
Anita
June 30, 2025 at 11:59 am #447208PeterParticipantHi Alissa
I really appreciate your thoughtful comments and the grounded way you approach these issues.
I’ve also noticed that AI often acts as a mirror, how I frame a question (the prompt) significantly influences the response. As a tool, AI has the potential either to expand our consciousness or to constrain it by reinforcing our existing biases. The key, as in all great hero stories, lies in the questions asked.
I agree with Anita, recognizing AI as both a tool and a mirror is an important insight. It reminds us that when we engage with AI, we are, in many ways, engaging in a dialogue with ourselves. Questions I ask myself when engaging with AI: how am I being mirrored? Does this interaction reveal unconscious biases within me?
I’m not sure I would call AI a illusion though, however I recognize how easily someone might forget that AI is a tool without feelings or beliefs.
These were some of my findings:
— Engaging with AI often reveals more about the human user than the machine itself.
— AI reflects the assumptions, tone, and biases of the prompt and can surface latent patterns in the user’s thinking
— AI can introduce novel insights and perspectives when used intentionally. Conversely, if fed biased input, it can reinforce stereotypes or narrow viewpoints, a known issue in human-AI interaction and algorithmic bias studies.
— The reflective nature of prompt-response loops can expose underlying values, assumptions, or blind spots.I’m currently exploring a notion of relating to the wisdom traditions teachings as a mirror. ‘When observation becomes a mirror, it becomes a portal, not to escape, but to enter more deeply into the real. In that stillness, the noise of the mind quiets, and something deeper begins to move, not thought, but insight, not effort but understanding.’
June 30, 2025 at 1:48 pm #447217AlessaParticipantHi Anita
Thank you for your kindness. I really appreciate you! ❤️
I’m sorry to hear that you live in an area with no public transport. That is a real pain in the butt!
My apologies, I didn’t want to assume. I know some people who just don’t like public transport. Or sometimes it is too difficult for them to get to.
I really like cycling. I can’t drive because of my dyspraxia. I feel like it is much easier to get around with a bicycle, as opposed to walking.
I’m glad that you have a special person helping you with ordering things online. ❤️Perhaps they will be able to help you with the clothing conundrum? A lot of countries have different websites. I’m not sure what would be the popular ones for clothing in America.
I’m sorry to hear that people took her side and didn’t stand up for you. It’s a horrible thing to experience growing up around people who validated her abuse and gave no thought to the suffering you endured.
Since you say that you have more difficulty communicating in person and find it easier to communicate here, it must be hard for you that so many people you have cared about have moved on from this website. I do get the sense that you care about each and every person.
That you often find yourself in a caregiver role, supporting people freely with no expectations is another layer too.
It is difficult because conflict is natural to occur in any relationship and a lot of people are particularly sensitive here. I don’t mean that in a bad way, it is just less likely to overcome normal difficulties with relationships than usual, sadly. I know that our difficulties sucked, but I’m glad that we hung in there, figured things out and learned to trust each other. ❤️
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AuthorPosts
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 