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Lost love

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  • #65576
    Csaba
    Participant

    First of all, I would like to thank you for coming here and reading this, it means a lot to me.
    I’m a 20 year old guy, attending a small university.

    When I came to this university i met this beautyful girl, whom I became great friends with, but I felt much more than that. I can’t really express it, because I felt love, or something like that before, but this felt much more than that, unfortunatelly. After some time I managed to get enough courage to ask her out, of course the answer being no, but she doesn’t want to lose such a great friend, and I was foolish enough to stay friends. This agonized me for months, he even got a boyfriend a month after this, who she really loves and they have been together now for 9 months. Of course after a few months I coudn’t take it anymore, and I ended everything with her. My hearth still ached when I saw her in school, but it was better. This happened around a year ago.

    Then, summer came and I never had a better summer my whole life. I did all the crazy stuff I wanted, travelled alot, and actually felt great the whole summer. It truly made me happy. Then school came again, and I had to move back to my big city. Surprisingly this girl went to a different major, so I never saw her, and I felt happy. Now I wnat to say how much I want to feel nothing for her, things like this just pass with time, with many girls before, but for her they don’t and I hate myself so much for it.

    If you want to read the full story I made a post about it before, but it is not necessary:

    Is there an easy way to forget?

    The problem came now. She is still friends with my friends and school, although they don’t meet much. One of my classmtes managed to get us a lasergame room for free (which would be very expensive). She invited many people for this, and I really don’t want to miss it, But she also invited this girl, and whe will even bring her boyfriend. I know that if I’ll go it will truly hurt me very much, and yet I can’t just go on like this forever. I mean there will be many event where she will come, and I can’t always just refuse to go, and miss out being with my friends and all these awesome event. This truly bothers me and I don’t know what to do. Did someting like this happened to you? How did you solve a problem like this?

    • This topic was modified 10 years, 2 months ago by Csaba.
    #65603
    Inky
    Participant

    Well, you don’t know how it will be until you get there. You might see her and notice she’s changed. Or you may notice that your feelings aren’t as charged as you think they’ll be. The good news is it’s laser tag and you will be too busy running around to dwell much at all!

    For events in general where you’ll run into her, if possible, arrive an hour late and leave an hour early. Make brief eye contact, smile and wave. Then turn to the other people around you and concentrate on them. Use Body Blocking where you have your back turned to her. If she moves to the part of the room where you are (and she will!) casually move to the other end. Pretend your are magnets that make you go the opposite of where she is. Look at other people and other things. If she asks if you’re avoiding her say, “Not at all!” After all, you did the eye contact, smile and wave. If she corners you for small talk, talk for five minutes, keeping the conversation light and fun, then excuse yourself to go to the restroom.

    And bring a girl who’s a friend with you. Let her know the deal, she will keep you company and help with the small talk and escape! And might keep the old love interest wondering, or even second guess her original opinion/decision about you!

    So that is how you survive an event where an old love will be at!

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 2 months ago by Inky.
    #65636
    Csaba
    Participant

    Great advice, thank you. I Can’t keep on runnign forever, it’s time to fight back my emotions. Thanks again, cheers 🙂

    #65779
    Lucie
    Participant

    Hi!

    I know its hard for you to face her especially with her boyfriend. As Inky mentioned earlier, go there with one of your girl friend with whom you’re at ease. Keep yourself happy and smile. There’s much more to come and who knows you find your little princess out there. So chill! 🙂

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