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lying too much

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  • January 23, 2017 at 10:18 pm #126025
    Nayan Kumar
    Participant

    hi i accidently found this site and i hope it will help me deal with my problem.
    in my childhood i used to stammer alot because of which people around me used to make fun of me.it completely destroyed my self confidence.i started trying to please people to make good impression of me.i started lying to gain sympathy.i dnt hide anything from people and tell them everything from reason behind my happiness to my problem.these things are disturbing me alot.how to get rid of my problem.please help

    January 24, 2017 at 10:15 am #126060
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear babbu:

    I am so sorry people made fun of you for stammering. It is very painful to be made fun of.

    I suggest you stop lying to people, on one hand; and on the other, no longer tell people everything. Tell people a little bit of the truth and see how they react. If they react to you with empathy, then you can tell them more.

    Make friends with decent people who do NOT make fun of you (or of others). Be selective. Notice, that everyone can be made fun of, for this or that reason. Those people who made fun of you can also be made fun of. Decent behavior is to not make fun of anyone.

    anita

    January 25, 2017 at 4:47 am #126104
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi babbu,

    I believe that people have to earn the right to know your backstory. So maybe for each time you see someone, tell them one thing about yourself. That’s it. Eventually the ones who matter will know you totally. But the jerks won’t get beyond a polite surface-y “Hi. I’m fine, how are you? Good bye”.

    You have to switch your mindset. THEY have to make a good impression on you too, you know?

    Best,

    Inky

    January 25, 2017 at 5:06 am #126106
    Zach Chen
    Participant

    Hi babbu,

    your issue is something that plague many people. Recently, i got to know of this book from Nick Vujicic, a motivational speaker with no limbs. He shared about bullying and i find that it is profound. You can read his latest book to get some encouragement and tips.

    I feel Anita and Inky have good advice for you, babbu.

    Like the cliche quote goes, “Those who matter don’t mind, those who mind don’t matter”.

    People who bully you for your traits are probably not worth your time and effort, compared to those who are nice to you.

    Have a good day!
    Zach

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