Hi everyone,

I wanted to share where I’m at and get some perspective. Last night’s chorus concert was unexpectedly emotional — I felt proud for putting myself out there, something I wouldn’t have done in college when I was overwhelmed, shy, and socially discouraged. Tonight is the cast party, and I’m looking forward to enjoying the camaraderie in a safe, creative space.

I also recently matched with someone on Bumble who wanted only a casual sexual connection, while I’m looking for someone monogamous to share a life and eventually start a family. That experience stirred up old feelings of rejection from my teen and college years. I’d love advice on finding love with someone who truly aligns with my values and respects my boundaries.

I’m still grieving our family dog, Brian, who meant so much to me, and trying to build new friendships, which feels challenging as I’m shy and neurodivergent. Visiting my old international school this week was deeply nostalgic — I wished I had appreciated those years more, especially since I actually found kind, accepting peers I clicked with there, which I never experienced in college.

I’m proud of myself for holding my boundaries, not compromising for someone who wouldn’t respect them, and for continuing to put myself out there socially. I’m also restarting therapy soon, now that I have insurance, and hope it will help me process grief, loneliness, and past mistakes while building a life I truly want.

I’d love any advice, insight, or reflections on navigating hope, grief, loneliness, self-protection, and finding meaningful romantic connections.