Home→Forums→Relationships→Mental breakdown after a break up
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June 3, 2018 at 8:37 am #210559AnonymousInactive
I have been in relationship with this person for about 6 years. He started talking to other females two years ago so he broke up with me to continue with this lifestyle. 6 months later he asked me to get back together only to find out he was jealous that I was moving on and dating. Now 2018, he started talking to somebody and one night told me I had to move out and I couldn’t live with him any longer, I’m basically in square one again, I have nothing besides my car, job and going to nursing school. We also have a child that due to my tight schedule I can see him maybe twice a week. I have been emotionally unstable and I cant seem to find a way to cope with everything that’s going on. My child tells me how much he misses me every night and my heart hurts every day. Last night my ex told me that he was happy with the person he was with now and that he is happy where they are going in life. So I broke down and texted him like multiple times non stop, it was insane. I have never seen myself in such a low position to the point I feel like Im stalking him with all those texts. I feel betrayed and I have a lot of anger but at the same time I don’t want to look the crazy ex that cant seem to let it go. Any ideas how to cope, how to avoid texting him like a maniac when im upset? , for the sake of my child I need to be mentally stable. Any books that are good for finding inner peace?
June 3, 2018 at 12:44 pm #210601nextstepsParticipantHello,
I hope you are doing better today. I just wanted to say you aren’t alone even if you may feel alone now. The thing that struck me about your message was that you have got some real blessings in your life e.g. your child and the fact you are on the way to doing your dream job (both of which not everyone get to experience) which are things that you can hold onto during this tough time.
In terms of suggestions for inner peace. I can only offer what I have read myself. Firstly the untethered soul was a book the sounded most like me when I first found it so that would be one I would recommend. Also Louise hays books are quite calming and soothing e.g. looking to a higher power. I also liked ‘the celestine prophecy’ and ‘the alcehmist’ both of these are similar in that they appeal to a higher power/fate which I found comforting.
If you would like other online help, in the UK there are websites like 7 cups of tea, relate as all as talkspace. I used talkspace for 3 years and it did help overall and was relatively cheap compared to other forms of counselling. The British counselling directory bacp also is helpful for face to face therapy. The headspace app is also useful and you can try it free for 10 days to see if you like it.
If you struggle sleeping, perhaps try guided meditations or read books that completly get you out of your head e.g. children’s books (as the world the authors create are safe and happy and it’s a nice escape). For those books I would recommend ‘a little house on the prairie’ or any of your favourite kids books. For adult books that offer escapism my favourite currently is ‘Eleanor Oliphant is completey fine’ -this is a book about inner transformation.
I hope you are doing okay. Xx
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