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- This topic has 20 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 6 months, 3 weeks ago by anita.
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March 21, 2024 at 2:50 pm #428880anitaParticipant
Dear IMBACK:
“Maybe I should try and tell her that she may be dealing with BPD“- I suggested that earlier. I think that it’d be best for you to see a counselor/ therapist that specializes in your age group, and who can help you. I think that you need 1-on-1 professional help, not random communications online.
anita
March 21, 2024 at 3:01 pm #428881IMBACKParticipantI question a bit if I have BPD, but I have never dealt with something like it before. Im not sure about anything anymore.
March 21, 2024 at 3:13 pm #428883IMBACKParticipantI talked to my parents about seeing a therapist, but my parents wants me to actually do something about my personal life before starting therapy. Im just not sure anymore about anything. I am accusing her of so many things and I am accusing myself of so many things that it is hard to see what is what. We are going on a vacation together soon and I will start from now on to do something about myself. I will see if my thoughts keep coming when im trying to get better and If they do I might just have to break up, because something is wrong and I am for some reason pointing fingers at my relationship.
March 21, 2024 at 3:24 pm #428884anitaParticipantDear IMBACK:
“I question a bit if I have BPD… I’m not sure about anything anymore… I might just have to break up, because something is wrong and I am for some reason pointing fingers at my relationship.“- I used to be as confused as you are, maybe even more confused than you are, and for a long time. What a relief it is to have clarity!
Clarity is way, way better than Confusion, and it can- it must- happen for you too: confusion replaced by clarity!
Please keep in mind that it’s okay to end a romantic relationship, it’s not a crime. It happens every day in every part of the world and people survive; many times, people are better for it.
I wish you courage, strength and patience, and may the force be with you (it’s a Star Wars saying)!
anita
March 21, 2024 at 3:41 pm #428885IMBACKParticipantThis Is my first love and since meeting her I have been hooked that she was the love of my life. As I mentioned above I am going on a vacation with her in about a week and I will start to try and deal with my personal issues. If nothing changes with the way I feel about her, then I may have to break up. I just want to look back at our relationship and think to myself that at least I tried. Even though im hurting the memories. I have discovered one thing. Love is very difficult.
March 21, 2024 at 5:17 pm #428889anitaParticipantDear IMBACK:
“I have discovered one thing. Love is very difficult.“- loving very difficult people is… very difficult. Another thing that’s very difficult is being too afraid: too afraid to be together, too afraid to be alone, just overall, too afraid.
Best for you would be to lessen your fear/ anxiety by a mindfulness daily regiment of aerobic exercise (fast walking, swimming), listening to calming mindfulness guided meditations, journaling, if that works for you.. If you could join a yoga class or a tai-chi class, that would be great. You can research mindfulness exercises or practices (there are books and workbooks on the topic).
I hope your vacation will work out, take it easy while on vacation, take time out when you need to get away and be alone, and communicate best you can with her.
anita
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