Hello, thank you very much for reading and adding your input.
Im coming here anonymously because I cant talk about this to anyone and I cant keep it to myself anymore.
Here’s the deal: I have been in a long distance relationship for a little over a year now, I love this man, he really is amazing and we want the same things in life, we get along greatly and he treats me wonderfully, my family knows him, and I know his.
We actually got engaged because we live in different countries and we want to finally be able to develop our relationship and make a life together. I would have loved to move in together before tying the knot but unfortunately that wont be possible. In fact the only way for us to continue our relationship right now would be either marrying or moving to some other country (neither his, nor mine) because of visa, job situation and so on.
The problem here is that Im suspicious he is a highly functional alcoholic, I know alcoholism runs in his family and he considers his drinking like no big deal, he is in huge denial and cannot see it. Whenever I bring up the topic he gets a bit defensive, never disrespectful or anything, but he does respond in a contradictory way sometimes because he does admits that he drinks a lot, but then he also says he likes having his drink and there is nothing wrong with that. At the moment he doesn’t have a job which is also a great moment to drink out of boredom (though I would personally do something different with my free time). He says once he finds a job and we are together it will be different, but I don’t know how real is this. I mean, to me a glass or two of wine every night is too much, and Im pretty sure some days is more than just that, since we are long distance I cant really be there to know how much he is drinking (neither I want to nag myself into counting his drinks), but this is really keeping me worried.
I love this man, i swear if he didn’t drink the way he does he would be perfect, I guess we all have flaws. It isn’t easy these days to find someone who is emotionally available and wants to make a life of marriage and children and this guy does want all that with me.
I just don’t know if I should jump into this risk with him and the fact that I have doubts about it makes me feel guilty, I’ve talked about it to him and he has said before he will reduce his intake but I think he has a problem and reducing his intake for a couple days wont do it. I just cant predict whether if he will begin drinking at a normal pace or if his intake will only become worse within time.

Thank you a lot for reading and I appreciate your advise.