July 23, 2023 at 6:14 pm #420967Orion82Participant
Hello, I would like to ask some suggestion about a situation I’m in.
Something like 10 years ago I embarked, without my choice, in shift of how I see the real world, looking for a freedom from the stereotype of the society we live in, who led me on crazy journey like riding a rollercoaster.
But since then, the reaching of my dreams and life goals has been obstructed by the people around me. How? The easiest way to explain it is with the allegory of the cave by Plato.
So that allegory taught me that it’s pretty clear for now thta there is nothing that can make them see what they don’t see, as they will not believe unless they will see.
So, still, I moved forward on my way, but because of the behaviour of the people around me I started to grow a huge desire of revenge.
Actually, to be honest, I will not have to make any revenge, simply they will be hit back strongly by karma.
But I can’t wait to see their face hit by karma. It will be like spitting back all the poison.
These thought of revenge, even if growing, didn’t interfer too much with my thought process, till recently.
So, recently I started to make some money. Not that much, but I’m also strating small. What I have just to do it is simply “rinse and repeat” to grow this capital huge.
So, now that my capital is increasing, karma is going to hit them back. I’ll be retired in few years, while they will live by working a 9 to 5, by waking up every Monday morning at 7:00, waiting for the weekend every week, and “rinse and repeat” till retirement: this is the karma revenge.
The problem is that since finally my goal of karma revenge is so close, this thoughts of revenge fill badly my mind, I get nervous, sometime the stress take also my stomach, and I can’t focus neither for 5 minutes. I can’t sit in front of the laptop. I can’t work. The only thing I think is the revenge. I’m so close to reaching my goal, and because this thoughts fill my mind I can’t make it. And this is absurd.
Initially I thought it could have been procrastination, as it happened to me in the past. But when procrastinating you spend time doing not useful things, and for example, in my case, it was just looking for not useful things on Google and Wikipedia. For example, the last time I procrastinated, and it was a good while ago, I looked for how many sheep there are on earth, and how much each sheep is worth 😅
So, now I know that I’m not procrastinating, I have only this revenge thoughts on all the things that I’ll say to them once I’ll show them that I made my dream true even if them turned me down.
So, having understood this problem, I started to Google keywords like “how to let it go Buddha” “Revenge in Buddhism”…
And I found for example some Buddha stories helpful. I stumbled on the song “let it go” and the “song frozen” by Madonna. Actually the song by madonna also make a lot of sense. And eventually I found this “tiny Buddha” website, where I read several stories about the relation of people and their parents and their family, to which I really can relate.
And once I saw that on tiny Buddha there is also this forum, I decided to share my story here to see if somebody can have some suggestion on how to overcome this revenge thoughts that freeze me and that stop me to reach my goal.
Maybe you have some book you can suggest me to read?
Please, consider that I understood that I should stop by myself to think about them. And apparently it should be easy. But it’s not easy. I’m trying not to think about them, but it’s like more i try not to think about them, the more I think about them. It’s like a negative vortex.
I think it’s because it’s too much the hatred I build up towards this people around me.
So, for suggestion I don’t need something like: “don’t think about it” or “if you think about them you will waste time of your life” (and it is already has been 2 months like this).
It would be great if you can suggest me “a way” on how not to think about them.
And you know what, I’m also thinking that maybe I will have relief simply after posting this message on this forum, by finally letting out all this thoughts that I have in my mind…
Thanks in advance if you can answer.July 24, 2023 at 6:44 am #420992HelcatParticipant
I’m glad to hear that your efforts at a non-traditional lifestyle and building your own business are paying off!
There is a lot of pressure in this world to behave in certain ways and do certain things. Some people feel threatened or jealous of others breaking the mould. Some people just believe that any attempt to do so will fail and seek to prevent suffering. It sounds like people have said and done things that hurt you during your journey to create your ideal lifestyle. Do you want to talk about it?
I’m curious to hear about your experience of building your non traditional lifestyle. Outside of the issues with people, was it difficult? Were there any other issues?
I wonder if all in all trying to build this lifestyle has been a struggle (including dealing with people)? Sometimes when we have struggled for a long time our bodies and minds can get stuck in that mode even when things are getting easier.
Are things getting easier for you in your life now that business is picking up? Are you resting and taking enough time to take care of yourself? I hear that running your own business can be demanding?
Especially when you are feeling the difficulties of the past, I think it’s important to take extra care of yourself and try to build some good memories in the present.
Proving other people wrong might have been good motivation in the past, but it sounds like you’re achieving all of the things that you wanted to. Now what was once motivation is no longer serving you and bringing unhappiness. My therapist used to say that it’s okay for the need for a coping mechanism to pass. It’s important to reflect on how it did help in the past whilst recognising when it is no longer useful.
Habits take time to change. Please be patient with yourself. It’s okay to feel what you’re feeling.
Eager to hear your thoughts.
Wishing you all the best ! 🙏July 24, 2023 at 12:49 pm #420996PeterParticipant
Have you noticed how many different understandings of Plato’s Allegory of the cave there are? How the explanations almost always reinforce the argument the person is presenting and in that way, proving Plato’s point.
And Here I am about to do the same. 🙂
It seems to me that one of the points Plato was making is that ‘we see the world as we are not as it is’… (That how we see the world is constructed, most of it though language where the common error is to mistake the map (our constructs our words) for the territory.) Thus, the task to “know thy self”, if only to see the world more clearly as It is.
Anyone engaged in the task soon discovers that Plato’s Cave is a nesting doll of caves within caves within caves. In my opinion such a quest of self-discovery, when honestly perused, can only lead towards humility and compassion.
What then of Karma, Is Karma the same as justice, reward and punishment, the cosmic Santa Clause? Everything I’ve read on the subject says No. That is its great misunderstanding. Karma is impersonal… Karma is as it is, a reality of life as it is. Action, cause and effect. The something, if we take up the task, we can influence and so change how we experience/see Life as It is.
If I kick a large rock and break my toe is that, Karma? Yes, but not because kicking a rock is morally wrong and so I must be punished for my actions but because breaking my toe is a natural result of kicking a rock. Should I blame the rock? Is rock karma to be punished for breaking my toe? Is my desire for the rock to be punished bad karma?
In the task to “know myself” I might, after kicking the rock and limping away, better ask myself why I kicked the rock and to focus on my own karma (actions) and avoid projections. (Note in the allegory of the cave it’s the projections (our shadows) that are the illusions.)
Karma has nothing to do with our notion of Justice. (Our notion of Justice is a construct, too much of which has come about based on our projections.)
In Christianity it is acknowledged (though forgotten even as we say the words) that as we forgive, we will be forgiven. In other words, karma, who we are, how we are and our actions as we engage with Life matters. Like karma, the focus is not on or about the other but on our own being and it it this that will define our experience. (I might argue that it is this truth that makes each of us co-creators, bigger then big…which is both terrifying and wondrous.)
Sadhgure book ‘Karma’ is worth a read.August 3, 2023 at 9:01 am #421117AParticipant
I’m new here (first post), and Plato’s Allegory fascinates me.
Is it possible that you can be satisfied in yourself, without karma, revenge, or financial success?
There’s a lot of freedom in letting go.