First of all I apologies for the topic I have posted if this is an inappropriate topic. But I really need help as I am very confused and depressed.

I am 25 years old and I have a habit of masturbation (rarely). And while I am doing it I can’t control my thoughts that different people and situations comes into my mind. I can’t figure out whether those thoughts are intentional or not. When those thoughts come into my mind I force them to go away and try to only think about my boyfriend which makes it even worse. It’s like trying to not to think about a pink elephant. The more I pull those thoughts away they come again to my mind even more. And I think when those thoughts comes up I sometimes think about those thoughts for a few seconds to make my self feel good. It’s not like I have any feelings for that person. But I just try to pleasure my self for the moment.

I feel very guilty about this and I can’t control my thoughts. And the worst thing is After I masturbated I feel like everything in my room is contaminated with sexual fluid and I wash everything and throw everything away (obviously not everything is contaminated it’s just a doubt). I feel like I need to clean everything to get rid of sexual fluid because I thought about different people. I think among those thoughts 75% are about my boyfriend and only 25% is about others. I know this sounds weird.

I only love my Boy friend so much and I have no intention to be with someone else or to cheat. I love him in all my heart. But I can’t control my thoughts. So when those thoughts comes up I automatically think about them while I am masturbating. I even talk about this to my boy friend he said it can happen and not to over think about it and to let it go.

Anyway I am now trying to control my thoughts, feelings and also trying to stop masturbating completely. But My problem is I feel like I need to wash everything up to make the past actions I have done correct. If not I feel like it will add up to bad karma and I’ll born in a bad place as a bad person in my next life.

I even saw a psychologist and he said whether the thoughts are intentional or not I don’t need to wash everything up. I want to know what other people do in such situations? I feel like I am trapped in a unrealistic world.

Please help me.
I want to know
1)Is that necessary to wash everything to make everything correct and clean (I sometimes just wash everything up even my bags, shoes, pillows etc just to ensure everything is 100% clean)?
2)How can I stop those thoughts?
3)If it is bad how can I correct the past wrong actions I have made?

Thank you in advance for anyone who could show me the truth and any advice to ease my pain and guilt.