hi

i found  this description of my girl friend .

“Most people feel uncomfortable telling a lie, and usually need to confess the lie and have a need to be honest. A sociopath is opposite to this. A sociopath actually feels uncomfortable telling the truth.

The lie is his weapon. It is his protection from the outside world. Sociopaths lie about everything and everything. They will make up huge stories, lies that they would obviously get caught out about later on, they will continue to tell, and when you are close to revealing the lie, they will lie further to protect the lie. Protecting the lie is more important than your feelings.”

every thing in that parargraph is true about my girl friend .

we were together in a long distance relationship for 3 years , we absolutely adored respected and trusted each other ( but now that seems like an illusion ) , i did not have a reason to doubt her we met 2 or 3 times a month any where between 3 to 7 days at a stretch, in between the meeti gs whats app was our mode of contact .

she relocated last october and since then we have met twice last was in march this year , in june we had our first fight it was over a rather small issue of her telling me she was not going to a office function but i found out she did go for it , and she lied about it .

since then ( early until end july ) we have been fighting like crazy and its all to do with the inconsistencies in her stories.

there were the classic signs of something not right the late working hours , lies cover ups and lies again , social media activity intensified , always being on whats app but not with me , ward robe re vamp, no time for us .

i came to visit her in first week of august and found out she was cheating on me since june , this was on the 12 aug i found out accidentally ( not snooping ) on her message when confronted she tried to lie at first but then gave in .

in retrospect i had caught her 7 to 10 times and did not want to persue it further as she claimed her work was getting her depressed ( works as a doctor in a govt hospital ), but i did adress my concerns and she always got angry .

and the times i was absolutely convinced she was having an affair she always reminded me of the good times we had and how we were and how i am ruining all this with my insecurities .

there were times i was so convinced i told her we are breaking up because this is not healthy for me but she managed to convince me other wise

i asked her whats the plan forward with us , her plan was i stay until 6th sep and then she goes back to him .

I did not accept that and decide to leave that very night , she then changed it to i stay and she breaks up with him for good .

so she first said she still loved him and would not break up witb him , on the 14th she said she will break up witb him i told her to call him and tell him that , to which she did in front of me .

and last night she says she wants to start this again and loves me .

Nothing is making any sense to me, how can she say she loves him 2 days ago and now says she loves me and not him anymore .

i also found out that when i was here ( i met her on 9th aug) she met him twice ( her colleague) and from messages ( snooping ) i found she promised to meet him after i go , i confronted her with these messages thats when she said she will stop this with him .

my concern is that if i did not find the messages she would have gone back to him anyway , and this calling and telling him can be just a smoke screen , she says i was always her love blah blah and she will be there 3 weeks so we can work this out.

i dont trust her any more coz she lies she is manuplative and she has little about right and wrong .

she has been  begging me to stay and i ask her what has changed since the 14th aug to last night and her replay is ” i want to be with u ” i have asked her this 100 times and its tbe same answere no deeper layers …which is also a concern that she is lying .

i cannot bear to see her crying and begging me even physically stopping me and today morning she swallowed 6 pills coz i said i was going .

i really want to go as i need to start healing again because the magnitude of the lies betryal and manupilation is enormus, but i cannot leave her like this she is a complete wreck right now sayjng she is sorry and will never do it again she has come to her senses , and that we will work this out to give her a last chance .

i was thinking of giving us  a chance staying until the 6th of sep.

and this i want to becasue i still love her but im scared it will be very difficult to trust her again even though she says she will never lie again .

can someone see something i dont