Hi Anita,

It’s on occasion if her boyfriend can’t get her son that I will get him every now and then. If I could guess I’d say once every 2 months or so I’m needed for something such as that. Twice this year I’ve had to get her daughter from school because no one was available and drop her home. Monday – Friday we almost never hang out or see each other. On the weekends it depends if I have school or something else going on as to whether or not we will hang out for the day together. With that being said I still need MY own personal family time which I a lot of times put their needs aside in order to spend time with my sister and mother.

My son and her son do go to VPK together so they do see each other every day almost. I’m thinking that’s what the issue is…. she is afraid that when my son leaves the school her son will be alone possibly? Just trying to figure out what the issue is and if I am wrong. She won’t speak to me and it’s been almost a week.

She wrote me a very long text stating her “concerns” which was mainly that her son and my son won’t be close anymore and that her and I will drift apart. I told her my reasons for moving and why I am having to vs my boyfriend moving. She seemed to understand then the next day I texted her, no response, the next day, no response. I texted her again and asked what the issue was. No response. I only know that she doesn’t feel it’s in the best interest of me and my son because her boyfriend told me.

She is getting married March 10th actually and I am the person marrying them, how crazy is that. She is living with her soon to be husband, their son and her other daughter from a different man.

That is very true. That’s how I’m perceiving it. It seems more as if she’s mad in more of a selfish manner than being the supportive sister that I truly deserve. I was in very very bad abuse marriage for 8 years of my life (together with him a total of 12 years). I am now happy and healthy and I am in a very loving relationship. I do know that it is best for me to move and for my son. My son needs stability and he adores my boyfriend and my boyfriends son. We are very happy with the decision and almoste very one else is except for my sister. She just reacted in a way that really shocks and hurts me.

She is a my way or the highway type person………. that is true. I’ve always had to re-arrange my life/schedule to fit hers. That’s been a never ending thing. IF for example you cannot make a family event or she needs something from me at that exact moment and I have other plans or for whatever reason can’t attend, she reacts with anger and will instantly cut me out and make passive aggressive comments to me.

I’ve helped her with her wedding thus far, I honestly don’t think it’s the stress of the wedding. Everything is done… we are just waiting on the day to come at this time.

Thank you, that makes sense truthfully. It’s hard to come to the realization that she’s that type of person because she really doesn’t appear to be. She attends church 2x a week, she is very family oriented BUT looking back at everything it’s all on her terms and no one elses. I’m mourning the loss of my sister but it honestly might not be a bad thing. She may have been a supportive person but she was also toxic in her own ways. I’m the type to forgive and forget… so if she comes around, I’m sure I will accept her but it won’t be the same. I guess I know now that she can be selfish and at times a toxic person. If she loved me and wanted to be my sister, she wouldn’t be acting this way and shutting me out so easily over a life decision I made.

Thank you so much! I appreciate it. You really did help put things in perspective a little more.

I think with me being an hour away from her it will help me not forget that her relationship with me is one-sided.