Home→Forums→Tough Times→So sad about new phase of my life
- This topic has 6 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 4 months ago by Meunus.
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August 19, 2016 at 2:31 pm #112869MefistoParticipant
Its been a week after i got into new job. I finally understand what its like to be an adult. Dead inside soulless adult.
So far this job robbed me of:
Ten hours of my everyday life. I worked 5 on my previous job.
My sleep. I sleep 2 hours less than i did with my previous job.
My hobbies. I almost dont do anything that i did before. Most likely i wont ever finish my novel of which half was already written. I am to exhausted after each day of working to create anything.
My education. I used to learn languages and read articles about science, philosophy, politics all the time. Now i almost dont read anything because my eyes hurts after working day.
My social life. I dont accept any invitations of my friends anymore. After working day i have only 3 hours before going to bed. On weekends i am available only on saturday and i cant party up late anymore because i cant afford to mess up my sleep schedule.
Instead of all this the job gives me:
Everyday stress and slight depression. All day long i get yelled at and criticized by my boss in front of room full of people. I am almost constantly feeling down.
Self-esteem issues. I feel very stupid and worthless because i cant get the work done. Two of my colleges do tasks like mine very fast and without mistakes. I cant do even one simple task without mistakes. I didnt realize the depth of my stupidity before starting this job.
Good money. Salary is 2.5 times higher than my last one.Good experience. After working here i probably will be able to find another job in same sphere. Before i didnt have any valuable experience at all, my last working place was a joke.
I cant quit, i have to hold on at least for 6 months or a year. I might get fired though because my boss says that she is disappointed in me and im still on trial period. Part of me secretly wishes this to happen, though i would be left out with nothing instead and would become pathetic neet once again.
- This topic was modified 8 years, 4 months ago by Mefisto.
August 19, 2016 at 2:46 pm #112872MefistoParticipantForgot to add that this job also robbed me off My health. I dont have rnough energy to do exercises no more and i feel much worse.
August 19, 2016 at 3:22 pm #112874AnonymousInactiveOh. Cmon you’re worth more than that.
Seriously. . How bad it could be?
Is it the only one available job in the world?
Complaining about your own choice should switch the red light on.
Do you really don’t. Like yourself so much so put you in the place where you’re appreciated, tired , cut off from your life because of what – money? Money doesn’t buy your happiness, they just a tool to have a life on acceptable level. Find a job where can you get enough money to pay your bills and have some spare for treating yourself..
No one deserves to be treated like a s***.Xxx
August 19, 2016 at 8:17 pm #112883AnonymousGuestDear Mefisto:
Please tell your boss you need to not be yelled at, that you really need her to stop yelling at you.
Then do your best at it since you can’t quit. If you get fired, in spite of your best efforts, then you will be free of all the negatives of this job.
But re-read your previous thread: “I hate my job” about your job before this one. You.. well, you hated that job.
Your sense of humor is too good to come out of a “. Dead inside soulless adult”- you are very much alive and lively, so tell her to no longer yell at you, a must! And do your best.
anita
August 20, 2016 at 5:53 am #112888InkyParticipantHi Mefisto,
I agree. Tell your boss not to embarrass you in front of others. He will be shocked. What people don’t tell you is it’s a pain in the azz to fire, hire, and train a new person. That’s three weeks of someone not doing your job ~ and not doing it as well as you.
In one of my jobs after being publically chewed out, I waited until the boss was in a meeting with a new client. I knocked on the door, opened it and whispered very loudly, “Your credit card didn’t go through!” I was never embarrassed that way again. And again, because it was too much of a pain to replace me (no matter how “bad” I was), I wasn’t fired, either.
I quit, though.
Make it an open secret that you are actively looking for another job. You may be surprised at the influx of energy you get after work hours when you know that it’s only temporary.
Good Luck!
Inky
August 21, 2016 at 6:57 pm #112953Rohail BukhariParticipantHi @mefisto,
Regarding your boss, one thing I will suggest is to try to talk to him privately and tell him respectfully that you dont like it when you criticize and embarrass him in front of others. If you are unable to do that, an alternate thing I would do is look at your situation objectively. You are currently observing your current reality and feeling terrible about it. What that means is that you are focussing on those things that cause you to feel pain. Look at your current situation objectively and understand that it is a reflection of your relationship with yourself. If your boss is criticizing you, you can objectively see that he his being negative, but when you find yourself feeling negative because of it, that is a reflection of your own attitude towards yourself. Try to change your own relationship with yourself, by loving yourself more and being kind and patient towards yourself, and do your best to at least not label THE REALITY of what your boss is doing to you as negative, while still acknowledging that he himself is being negative. Do your best. Dont condemn yourself if you cant do it at first. Learn to calmly control (not suppress) your emotions by seeing your reality as “just is” and neutral with no meaning, because it actually doesn’t have any positive nor negative meaning. From that point, see the positive in it, because it is there and then take positive action. Hope things get better for you!-Rohail Bukhari from hablufatblogs.com
- This reply was modified 8 years, 4 months ago by Rohail Bukhari.
August 23, 2016 at 4:49 am #113053MeunusParticipantDear Mefisto,
I can understand what you going through, coz I have been going through lot of shit stuff in life too. I have been fighting with myself for past 8 years now. And trust me I am loosing it all. But I know one thing, that some day it will turn around and when it will I will be better than even I ever wished for. Recently I started my own blog where I just write about anything I feel like just to get relax. One thing you must try harder is be social and don’t push your friends and well wishers out of your life. And sooner or later you will find things at right places.
All the best and try to be happy coz without your own help no one else can do anything for you.
Admin at http://meunus.com/
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