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The Busy Life of an Introverted HSP

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This topic contains 20 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Parker 2 months, 1 week ago.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 21 total)
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  • #302237

    Parker
    Participant

    Hello,

    I consider myself a highly sensitive person (HSP). People like me can get overwhelmed and drained from the outside world fairly easily. I’m also very introverted. I keep to myself and try to restore and preserve my energy that I use throughout my day. I find it pretty difficult sometimes because I have a bit of a busy life.

    I’m pursuing a Master’s degree in Library Science, I have an internship, and I work at my local library where I’m interacting with patrons. Work and school is mostly my life. When I’m not working, I’m doing stuff for school and when I’m not doing stuff for school I work. I feel like my energy drains quickly and but I can’t rest because I still have so much to do. I know I need to take care of myself but I just don’t know how to make time to do so.

    #302291

    Peggy
    Participant

    Hello Parker,

    I’m sorry to hear that you are becoming overwhelmed with all the pressures of work and school.  Are your sleep patterns good?  Do you wake up feeling refreshed?  Are you eating properly?  Do you have to work?  Is this part of your Masters degree?  Can you reduce your hours or cut this out entirely?  Is there a tutor or patron that you can talk to about this?

    I know that’s a lot of questions but if you start the day feeling tired, then you are going to feel as if your energy drains very quickly purely because you have less of it to start with.

    I look forward to your next post.

    Peggy

    #302295

    Parker
    Participant

    Hey Peggy,

    Thanks for responding. To answer your questions, yes I’m sleeping fine. I’m a little slow when I wake up but I think that’s normal. I eat as right as I can. I work part time and I have to work because this is the only job I have and this will provide experience for me when I have a full time job. I need money and I want to move out of my current living conditions (another story for another time). Work and school are not entirely related but it helps given the common ground. This is something that I truly want and I’m practically halfway through my program. If all goes accordingly, I should be done in the following Spring.

    I work 4 hours a day. It may not sound like much but it can be draining depending on who you work with and top that with stuff for school. I’m just an HSP that loses energy too fast. I can still cope with the energy I have left. It’s just hard. I do have rest times it just doesn’t feel like it’s enough. Like, I will rest up a bit before work and right after work, I’m drained again. I think that’s just a part of who I am.

    As for a tutor or a patron, I’d say no. I’m very cautious about whom I trust (another long story). I do have a life coach that I talk to sometimes though. Been seeing a life coach for a few years now.

    I just feel worn out from life.

    #302297

    Elle
    Participant

    Hello Parker,

    I can very much relate to what you’re dealing with right now. I also am a highly sensitive person and an introvert. I am a librarian and was working full time and going for my masters degree full time. I literally went to work, went home and did school work, went to bed, and repeated  that. I got to the point where it was too much. I did have a supervisor who allowed me to do school work after I finished my work and it was quiet. This was helpful. Would that be a possibility for you? I also cut back on the amount of classes I was taking so it wasn’t so overwhelming.

    Regarding your work and schooling and feeling drained, have you really thought about what you want to do for work once you’ve finished your degree? Depending on what you do for work can have a big impact. Do you have a job that primarily deals with patrons? Have you thought about a specific discipline or area that is suited both for what you’re interested in and works well for your introversion and being an hsp?

    Believe me, if I could just go to work and work and not deal with people I would freaking love my job. My work is very rewarding, but there are parts of the job I dread. it’s the people that tend to stress me out and so if that’s the same for you it would be a good idea to come up with strategies to deal – what kinds of activities can you do when you’re home to relax and forget about work or school worries? Figure out a routine of self care and relaxation to take good care of yourself. I personally recommend yoga and walking.

    I hope this helps. Take care.

     

     

    #302307

    Parker
    Participant

    I think I would love to work in an area where I wouldn’t have to deal with people. I’m friendly and all but I can only do so much. Anyways, I should have mentioned that I take online courses. It’s a little different from classroom courses but can still be demanding in terms of assignments. Basically, I read the material for the week, write about it on a discussion board, and work on the current assignment of the week while working and interning on top of it all.

    As for hobbies…I pretty much stick to my computer. I truly try to read more but I always find myself glued to computer. I don’t really do anything else unless I forcibly move myself to do something different.

    But yeah, I’m still open to ideas on what I want to do after getting a masters, but I think I would love to where I can just do independent work without having to worry about other people/patrons

    #302311

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Parker:

    If I understand correctly, what is draining you is interacting with people. You are highly sensitive to people criticizing you, or disapproving of you in their private thoughts, if not overtly, in what they say to you, or how they say what they say to  you.

    It is draining to be criticized or disapproved of repeatedly by people when you work with them… sort of being under attack, in a war zone of sorts, so you stay away from people best you can.

    Did I understand correctly?

    anita

    #302327

    Parker
    Participant

    Umm…yeah. Yeah, I think so.

    #302345

    Peggy
    Participant

    Hi Parker,

    I can also relate to being highly sensitive and grew up being very shy (introverted).  I see it as a protective device where we recoil into ourselves.  The original reason for doing this has probably long since passed yet still we do it.  It might be worth checking that you don’t have an under active thyroid (or any other condition) as this can have the effect of making you feel tired.

    Also, if you are basically glued to your computer in your spare time, I am wondering if you get enough exercise in the fresh air.  Exercise, strangely enough, is energizing.  Therefore, I agree with Elle that walking could help.  Tai Chi also helps energy move through the body.

    With regard to your on-line studies, could you possibly write down a few bullet points on a card and take these out with you so that you are combining studies with movement.  This will have the added benefit of helping with your assignments.

    Do you get much time off at the week-ends.  Will you be getting a Summer Break from your classroom studies.  I’m just wondering if there will be a chance for you to recharge your batteries over the coming few weeks.

    Peggy

     

    #302361

    Parker
    Participant

    I don’t really have a lot of time on weekends. I usually have Sundays off. I usually just rest to recooperatate from the week. I then try to get some stuff done for school. Yeah, I don’t get much exercise because I hate it. I hate the vigorous type. With my money going towards my masters, I don’t think I can afford to take classes in yoga or tai chi. I already had my summer break and I won’t be done till early September.

    #302373

    Peggy
    Participant

    Hi Parker,

    Exercise doesn’t have to be vigorous.  Tai Chi is very gentle and can be learned from a book/DVD even possibly You Tube.  Other than what I have already suggested, I don’t think I can be of any further help to you.

    Your body needs three basic things.  1)  Food and drink  2)  Exercise  3) Rest/relaxation/sleep.

    Neglecting any one of these things is asking for trouble.  Are you sure you can’t set aside 20 minutes a day for a few gentle stretches.

    Peggy

    #302387

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Parker:

    There is a way to deal with our thoughts of other people disapproving of us and criticizing us, or our  own disapproval and criticism of self. There is a term, “inner critic”, that applies to the voice in our brain that criticizes ourselves, be it in direct self critical thoughts or in imagining other people are thinking those critical thoughts.

    Let’s say you interact with people in the library where you work and one of them is looking at your direction in a way that seems strange to you, with a facial expression that is strange,  and you think: he is thinking I am ugly, or.. he is thinking I am not  doing a good job. What you do is notice that you just had a self critical thought which you projected into another person.

    Then think to yourself: maybe that person is looking at my direction but is not looking at me, maybe he is spaced out and thinking about someone else. And maybe that person has this look  on his face because he is physically uncomfortable, maybe… constipated, and I only imagined he was thinking about me.

    When you notice these thoughts and talk sense to yourself, over time, you get less stressed around people, and not as drained because you no longer feel repeatedly attacked by other people’s thoughts.

    anita

    #302411

    Parker
    Participant

    I try that sometimes. It just takes a while for it work.

    #302457

    Parker
    Participant

    Yeah, I think try doing some exercises like Tai Chi or Yoga.

    #302467

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Parker:

    Post again if you want,  after trying this or that and share about  your experience, will you?

    (It will help if you address each one of your reply posts to the member you are replying to, by name, that way the member will know who you are referring to in any one of your posts).

    anita

    #302507

    Peggy
    Participant

    Hi Parker,

    I’m glad you are taking on board the suggestion made by Elle and myself regarding Yoga or Tai Chi.  Both disciplines have their own great merits.

    Can I just say here that I’ve only been offering my advice on Tiny Buddha for a couple of weeks yet I’ve already found out that 80% of people who post problems don’t even bother to reply to the Forum.  Maybe ingratitude and time wasting is what caused them to have problems in the first place.  Anyway,  congratulations to you for genuinely wanting to resolve your current difficulty – top 20%.

    Some people are just more sensitive to the energy being given out by others than other people.  If you do have the belief that other people are criticizing you, then maybe you could work on your self-esteem and confidence (plenty of books available).

    It also occurred to me that you might like to spend some time surrounded by nature – it’s very energizing to be near trees and water.

    Also, when you’ve completed your studies, would working with animals in some way be an option.  Just a thought.

    Peggy

     

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