I can relate to your emptiness. It sort of feels numb; there is something missing and you’re looking for it. I can almost promise you that this guy will not give it to you. It’s hard to accept and to let him go, I know this, but you have to choose people who choose you. It is only hurting yourself to go for a guy you know you cannot have right now. Don’t choose to hurt yourself. The emptiness will only grow. Sometimes I sit there and I want to erase myself. I don’t want to be here and I never want to come back. But the reality is, you have to be. You need to find the best out of this life. Even if this life treats you awfully. I hope it helps to find people you can relate with.