Of course this requires mutual effort. Right now there is no such thing. So, i will let the river take its course.

Your reply shows exactly how loose things are and can be. You previously said something about avoiding what ifs. There is no one to guarantee you that in the next relationship you can avoid anything. In life, there are infinite variables. That is why i insisted in focusing with my current situation instead of focusing in future relationships. Right now, all i need is feedback, like you said. I am sure that you too agree that her silence is creating a bunch of unanswered thoughts, a situation in which that many of us reading this topic can correlate with.

Hello once again my friends!

I would like to share with you some updates on this topic!

Your advice really helped me see where i was wrong concerning the issue with my ex girlfriend. The past 6 months have been hard form me as i was trying to get back on my feet. In my journey i realized a a lot about myself and the way i deal with other people. I indeed was selfish but i also had hidden issues that needed to be resolved.

I also met another wonderful girl who stood by me all the way. One month ago, we decided to get into a relationship. She knows all about me and my ex(es) but gave us a chance. Last week, i posted a pic on my fb account and 2 days later i got a pot of red flowers with a card writing ‘You don’t have to know who i am. I just wanted to say i am sorry. sorry.’

I told my gf and we tried to figure out who this girl was. I also posted on fb ‘seeking the person behind the anonymous sorry:)’
A day later i got an email writing ‘i am sorry. There is no meaning finding out who the girl who says sorry is etc etc”
I opened it but did not actually read it. I thought that saying sorry anonymously was immature.

My gf suggested that (if it is my ex indeed) i should contact her so to resolve past unanswered questions. I believe that it is my ex just saying i am sorry for everything, now that i have finally moved on. My friends say that she wouldn’t have sent flowers if she didn’t want something…

I didn’t want to dig into this so to protect my new girl, as it is not right for both of us. That’s why i deleted the email. But this whole thing made me think.

What is your opinion…? Thank you!

Anita, so you think that the ‘apology’ is not sincere;someone is playing games? Why would ananyone do that? Especially if is my ex?
As i already told my friends, an anonumous apology is not an apology

This is exactly what i thought too. It was an impulsive thought/action. But i did got an email the day after i posted on fb about it. That made me think

Yes, i think that is the right thing to do. I was hoping though it was a true ‘i am sorry’ mail from my ex. At least i would have known that she recognized the pain i felt. I don’t want to think that she sent it because she lost attention.

Dear Anita,

I agree with you on your thought on my new relationship. I will try and not make the same mistakes.

About the apology, keep in mind that this person took the time to write an email also, in order to say who she is in an indirect way. I did not read the mail as i was sure it will bring me down psychologically. This action gave rise to many questions. If it is my ex (i believe it is), why did she took the time to apologize for her behavior, even after 3-4 months? My friends say now that she broke up with her (short term) relationship and saw that i moved on, she wanted to seek my attention. They insist that no one sends flowers and emails if he/she does not want something from you. I am confused.