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When it seems like you are stuck while everyone else is moving forward

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This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Prash 1 week, 3 days ago.

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  • #235313

    Mia
    Participant

    I am new to the Tiny Buddha community.

    I am 26 old this year and i feel like i have not achieved anything much in all these years. Every minute i spent seems like a waste to me. Life is not moving forward and i am stuck in one place. Nothing good or bad happens. It’s just endless boredom with no purpose.
    <p style=”text-align: left;”>Meanwhile my friends, siblings and former collegues are charging forward with new exoeriences and great opportunities. While i am happy for them it just bothers me how i am unable to escape from this endless loop of disappointment and lack of purpose.</p>
    Years come and go but the only thing that changes is my age. When i look back i see how little i have achieve and how much more i could have achieved.

    I try my best to lead a happy and fulfilled life but at times it all falls apart when things go wrong or when i see how great other people are managing their lives. I know this pattern is harmful for myself and the others around me. Is anyone here feeling the same way? How do you cope with it?

    #235331

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Mia:

    I would like to understand, therefore I ask: you believe that among all the people you know, they are all highly functional and you are the only person who is not functional?

    Can you choose one of the people you know of about your age, that you consider the least successful and then compare her to you in regard to achievements, “charging forward with nee experiences” and enjoying “great opportunities”?

    anita

    #235351

    Prash
    Participant

    Dear Mia,

    The place that you described – “being stuck in one place” “endless boredom with no purpose” “endless loop of disappointment ” “how little i have achieve and how much more i could have achieved” “it all falls apart when things go wrong or when i see how great other people are managing their lives”. That is the place I used to reside not very long ago. I visit this place time and again but of late I don’t stay there too long.

    How do I cope with it? what are the things that helped me cope with it?

    Many things played a part in that. It was not a dramatic process rather very slow but steady progress. A feeling of gratitude played a major role. Reminding what I was thankful for on a repeated basis helped. An intense desire to move out of that kind of place served as a strong motivator. Working with therapies such as cognitive behavioral therapy and acceptance and commitment therapy gave a major push to the process. Mindfulness and meditation practices are what I would call the foundation for this process of coping with these patterns.

    It is still a work in progress but definitely worth it to come out of that kind of thinking.

    Hope any of the above also helps you in your journey.

    Regards

     

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