Dear mariamomo:

If you attended competent therapy in the past, where you were taught skills so to pay attention to when you start getting anxious, then, at that early stage shift your attention from your fear to hearing the sounds around you, or to the feeling of something soft in your hand.. or doing one or two yoga stretches (choosing from a variety of tools)- then you can stop the escalation of the anxiety into more distress and panic attacks.

If you haven’t attended such therapy, maybe you can do so?

anita

Dear mariamomo:

Definitely daily.

There is a term to this daily practice: Mindfulness. It is the practice of paying attention to how your body feels throughout the day. You get better at it with practice (no other way to get better at it but the daily practice).

Let’s say you are walking- just walking- pay attention to how your feet feel when they hit the ground. Pay attention to your shoulders, as you walk: are they uptight? Pay attention to your breathing as you walk: is it superficial, or deep? Does your body feels hot, cold?

Same when you do almost anything else: when you wash dishes, how does the water and soap feel on your hands? How do the dishes sound as you put them away?

Anywhere you are, when you find yourself “in your head”- thinking and thinking, lost in thoughts of no practical value- shift your attention to how the hot water feel on your body (if you are taking a hot shower), or how does the face of the person you are talking to looks like (Eyes looking at you, or away, for example)

When you find yourself lost in thought when trying not to, let it be. If you give yourself a Mindfulness grade- you are missing the practice. You must be gentle with your performance and very patient.

It takes practice over time.

Try it, and post again, will you?

anita

Hi mariamoto,

This sounds obvious, but have your parents come and help set you up. Once you are in your room, know where your classes are, where to go for food, etc., etc., it will become routine. Your anxiety levels should fall.

Afterwards, you may deal with homesickness. Again, have your parents, siblings, and other friends and relatives visit you. And go home as much as you can!

What I did was send care packages to my daughter, email, Facebook, call and FaceTime/Duo. Freshman year I would contact her (through all the communication options!) once a week and send care packages once a month. Now that she’s a Junior I contact her way less. The University is her Home and she comes home to Visit. And yes, we still visit her too.

As for travelling, go with a friend or in a group. It will be more fun that way anyway!

Good Luck!

Inky