Confused..Lost..Don't know what to do!

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This topic has 4 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 6 months ago by Hana L.

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May 19, 2017 at 3:56 am #149955
Mirabelle
Participant
Hello everyone 🙂

A while ago, I shared with you my personel story which was about how I changed my religion from being a Muslim to a Buddhist. And some of you were really nice and supportive.

Even though, it’s difficult to live in a Muslim family and a Muslim circumference, but I fought to keep my Buddhist lifestyle as a secret until …. until my mom found out.

She found a paper of some Buddhist prayers that I usually say. And of course she told the rest of the family.

Wow! seriously like it was the thoughest thing ever when I had to stand in front of them and explain .. And yes I explained and I told the truth.

I told them that I am happy the way I am. I am loving being a Buddhist. My life is finally peaceful and that I’ve found answers for the questions that I’ve been asking myself the whole time… I even told them that Buddhism is mostly about a way of living in order to be happy and understand your self

But of course! They never understood and I don’t think they ever will. So basically right now, I am a sinful perspn for them or as they say it “kaffirah” … Just because Islam doesn’t make me happy and because I wanna build myself on true and peaceful precepts, means that I am ‘sinful’?!!

Anyways, no one of them talks to me right now, even when I try to expalin and explain all over again, they act like I never exist. They even called an Imam (Religious man) to talk to me. He did but could never influence me to change my mind. This is my life.

I am lost now. I really am.

I hope you are all having a beautiful and happy day people 🙂
- This topic was modified 7 years, 6 months ago by Mirabelle.
May 19, 2017 at 4:37 am #149961

Inky
Participant

Hi Mirabelle,

Instead of trying to convince them, leave a few Buddhist articles around the house. A fluffy tabletop book, a statue of a smiling Buddha, that sort of thing. Not a lot. Just a couple things. Through osmosis, they will get used to the idea.

Refer to Buddhism as a mental way of seeing things rather than a religion. Even though they aren’t talking to you now, be happy and calm around them. Maybe one day they’ll want to have what you have. Who knows?

Buddha would want you to be happy and peaceful in your own house, so try not to butt heads or argue. If they argue with you, just say, “You might be right” and move on. Don’t worry. They’re just in shock and are having a typical reaction.

Best,

Inky

May 19, 2017 at 7:32 am #149973

PearceHawk
Participant

Mirabelle you are not the one who is lost. I am a follower of Paramanhasa Yogananda and you would not believe the number of people calling me Atheist, which is a narrow minded reaction. I have been shunned by my family for YEARS because of this. But I am at peace with that because I know it is their choice, just as it is my choice to pursue happiness in my discovery in the teachings of Paramanhasa Yogananda. All you can do is wish them to discover peace, love, and happiness in their journey, whatever it may be. Allow them their path as you have yours, which, it looks like you are embraced with more love than ever before. There inso reason for you to question or doubt your relationship with Buddhism because of other religions’ beliefs.

I wish you all the love, peace, and happiness that life has to offer, for an eternity longer than a lifetime. It is the least you deserve.

May 19, 2017 at 7:42 am #149975

Anonymous
Guest

Dear Mirabelle:

You are in a very difficult situation because you “live in a Muslim family and a Muslim circumference”-

to be rejected by your family and society is very, very difficult for any individual. We need to be accepted, to be liked, to be acknowledged and interacted with-

There is a famous poem starting with:

“No man is an island,
Entire of itself,
Every man is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.”

Neither is a woman, or child. You wrote that you “Don’t know what to do!”- I don’t know either, what to possibly suggest to you. I don’t expect your family to reject Islam as well, following your lead. If they persist in punishing and ostracizing you, isolating you, then I imagine the only solution, if you are to continue with your beliefs and practices, is to move away.

anita

May 20, 2017 at 7:02 pm #150121

Hana L
Participant

Hello Mirabelle,

Do stay strong in this situation. It’s also a bit trickier since you are still dependent on your family. To me, the act of them calling an Imam to come and speak to you is quite serious about their current ‘non-acceptance’.

Apologies to Inky I have a different opinion to hers – I’m not sure if leaving Buddhist articles around the house would be accepted by your family. Do you have a school locker, or a safe spot that you can put all your Buddhist items for safe keeping (i.e. a sanctuary)?
Just my thoughts, but I wouldn’t want the scenario of a family member or even friend (in their ‘non-understanding’ of your situation) to do something drastic like throw away those Buddhist items in an effort to make you return to your previous religion.

Do take care.

Hana
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