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Hey anita
This poem brought tears to my eyes :’)
Many things that u said also did that in the past, i appreciate it 🙂
Today i had strong feelings/urges to leave, my mind villainizing her, telling me stories, all kinds of things. But at night (which is when i usually soften and get more emotional) i was imagining her, calling her “my sweet baby” in my mind and then i had a future scenario where she’s gone and i felt something inside of me, i cried and my head went “don’t leave me”.
I think i am so afraid that she’ll leave me that i go numb or flip to annoyed/aversion… It’s so confusing, all of it, the flip-flop, the feelings, the thoughts..
