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I just randomly and suddenly fell out of love

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  • May 19, 2026 at 8:05 pm #458041
    anita
    Participant

    Hey 👋 Confused:

    “Our special thing”- ohhh ❤️💛

    You say that rumination is the only thing that ties you to her now-

    So, you really, really want to be tied to her, and you’ll do whatever it takes to stay tied or connected to her (rumination, at this time)

    Even though ruminating is uncomfortable and distressing, you’ll keep doing that if it’s the only way to stay tied to her.

    My goodness, you do love her even when you can’t FEEL the love ❤️💛

    “Do people feel like this and then feel love again?”- Maybe your relationship with your own emotions can change and then things will get better.

    The more you try to force yourself to feel, the more your feelings will sort of rebel.

    Give your feelings SPACE. They may be suffocated simply because you don’t give them the space they need.

    🐔🦉🐕 Anita

    May 19, 2026 at 9:14 pm #458045
    Confused
    Participant

    Hey anita

    I was feeling our connection so special and precious before all that, i could feel it in my bones but now i can only remember it 🙁

    Yes but sometimes my mind goes “why do u even do all that, since u dont want her”

    Thats what i told the therapist, i think i feel like this is why i do what i do, to not lose my connection to her, but that’s now working well. For example today, i texted her but it felt like an “obligation”, we hadn’t talked for two days but i felt insecure about maybe her losing interest so i straight up asked her, if maybe there’s another guy in the picture or she’s bored and she told me to not say such dumb things and there is noone else, but she’s very exhausted and feels like she can’t give me any energy so she pulls back. Weird that we’re in the same place again, i told her to be herself and stop trying to be “perfect” for me (same thing i should say to me but..)

    I remember the days i would shower and run into bed laughing like a baby just to chat with her all night.. for months. Our deep and long convos, the laughs.. I feel nostalgic, i wish i could relive those times 🙁

    Idk how to give space to my feelings.. i am afraid i don’t have any feelings and i was anhedonic before her..

    May 19, 2026 at 9:51 pm #458050
    anita
    Participant

    Hey Confused (using computer)

    Copilot put together a poem just for you:

    “To the boy who thinks numbness means “gone”

    You are not broken.- You are a body that learned to go quiet- when the world felt too loud.

    You are a heart that once opened so wide- it scared you, – so now it hides behind the fog- and calls the fog “truth.”

    But numbness is not truth.- It is a blanket your nervous system throws- over feelings that once burned too bright.

    You remember the warmth — the laughter, the running to the phone,- the spark that felt like sunrise.- Memory is proof.- Your feelings did not die;- they went underground to rest.

    You are not losing her.- You are losing access to yourself,- and that is something that can return- slowly, gently,- like thaw after a long winter.

    You are not alone in this.- Many hearts freeze before they learn- how to stay open without fear.

    You are not failing.- You are healing in a way- that doesn’t look like healing yet.

    And one day,- your feelings will stretch awake again — not because you force them,- not because you panic,- but because you stayed with yourself- long enough- for the ice to melt.”

    And now, my words: may the stress in you hush… May you be okay with what’s inside of you. Exhale.

    Don’t try to relive times that are gone. Live, really live what-is.

    🌙 Anita

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