Teamoi, I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. It stinks to live your life according to other people’s rules, and it’s not fair to you or them.
You have value just by virtue of the fact that you were born. You have the same value as everyone else on the planet – even a king or a big-shot CEO. Spiritually and emotionally speaking, you are equal to them. On the inside, we’re all made of the same things.

One thing you need to realize is that everyone also has fear and doubt. You’re not alone in feeling inferior. Most people sadly feel inferior. So that person who is judging you is judging you from their own pain, because it helps them feel less inferior. Every time people try to hurt you it’s because they are lashing out from their own pain and shame.

Another thing you should know is that everything in life is there for a reason. You are experiencing these things because your soul chose for you to experience them. In fact, you are essentially creating these feelings for yourself. No one can hurt you without your consent, so you are basically hurting yourself through your projections on other people. Sometimes this inner pain can be the best catalyst for change and growth – the only reason why I know for sure that I can help people is because I know their pain.

What I encourage you to do is write down your fears and doubts: what are you really afraid of? What’s going to happen if you speak your mind? What can be the worst that can happen? Practice awareness and see your fears trying to protect you, but learn to take charge of them so you can be true to yourself.

I think it’s important to achieve a certain mental attitude before standing up for yourself to other people. If you are wavering in your beliefs, if you feel self-doubt or have low self-esteem or even arrogance, then standing up for yourself is a very difficult task.

Without knowing yourself how do you know who you’re standing up for?

I think the mind blanks when we are not calm. When calm you’re not worried about who you’re standing up to or what to say, you can take all the time in the world to come up with a response that suits your beliefs. We often think the fastest response is the best one, but that is not true, it’s about saying the right things, however long it takes and having inner comfort.

It’s not about who or what you are up against, work on your inner self and it will radiate outwards through words and actions.

So if you want to be able to stand up for yourself you have to know what it is you’re standing up for and why.

Also only very small individuals bring other people down, they just want to feel big, even when they have achieved a lot, they still remain tiny on the inside. They also just want to be happy, the same as you, but their methods never grew.

So just say you don’t know, or you’ve never thought about it before. It’s the truth, they can’t do anything about it and neither can you.

When it comes to defending other people it can be very complicated indeed and I would think depends too much on the situation and the people in question. It’s difficult to say anything about this.

I suppose you should do what you feel is the right thing to do. What makes you feel good about yourself as a person and you can be proud of, sometimes that’s more important than the consequences.