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Alf

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 23 total)
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  • #73308
    Alf
    Participant

    What’s more important, labels or love?

    All religions and beliefs work towards the same core values of building family and a better world out of love, the devil – as they say – is in the details.

    If either partner chooses to prioritize said details above said core then in my book that’s a mistake. But it’s a mistake which some people have to make. If you still love those people you can try and make them see this, but it is their own choice.

    I’d say the best way to guiding them to being enlightened on this is just to allow them to walk their path, and keep walking your own. Stay open to the possibility is could all work out, but also be aware that you can’t force it.

    • This reply was modified 6 years, 11 months ago by Alf.
    #51175
    Alf
    Participant

    Not sure what you are saying/asking mate?

    #50495
    Alf
    Participant

    Can never get my head around why someone’s sexuality should be even a slight issue in today’s day and age. Well done Sonia.

    #50489
    Alf
    Participant

    It’s almost as if you’re describing Splinter with those Enneagram result 😀

    Tried that myself and it absolutely nailed me……

    Some words that describe you: principled, moralistic, perfectionist, self-critical, creative, unique, authentic, emotional, intelligent, cerebral, questioning.

    …..I have no idea which Superhero/Villian that would relate to though! lol.

    #50488
    Alf
    Participant

    You should have knock his frickin’ head off instead! BWATANG!!!!! WHO’S HARDEST NOW BEEYATCH?!?!! BOOM!

    :p

    Just messing, nice to hear a story where past wounds have been healed by nothing more than acceptance and forgiveness. Well done 🙂

    #50487
    Alf
    Participant

    A more caring family is definitely worth considering as Mark suggests.

    Also, is it possible that you could take just one of the dogs with you? That way one will get looked after well, and the others will stand more chance of being looked after.

    You could also tell your family to sort themselves out. If you want I’ll gladly drop them an e-mail/msg and tell them to sort themselves out too.

    #50202
    Alf
    Participant

    Excellent advise from Matt & The Ruminant.

    Cut yourself off from social media Prakhar and go out and meet some new people. It’ll help loads.

    #50201
    Alf
    Participant

    All you can do is be yourself.

    #50200
    Alf
    Participant

    Hi Hyo,

    Just remember something – it’s usually bullshit. “bad” is a standard placed on things by other members of society and it’s all relative to other things, so saying the “economy” is bad for example doesn’t take into account how awful it was in 5 million BC, and how we got by alright then.

    And for those problems which usually exist, as David says, a realistic and obtainable solution is often available, but it’s just not always that easy to obtain either.

    People who help others have to be among the strongest out there as there is rarely an end point. there may be moments of success, there may be some real progression which you can always pride yourself on, but helping others by it’s very nature means having to deal with negativity. The key thing is just to do what you can and not judge on results. Someone suicidal and needing your advice? All you can do is give it them, if they still of themselves it’s their choice – you’re just an adviser and so long as you do that with love and genuine intent then that’s all you can do.

    #49888
    Alf
    Participant

    This…….

    [i]Can you really trust someone who is sitting in a room with you, I assume sharing a bed, eating next to you and while thinking of moving far away he does not talk with you about this major change?

    This is just my opinion…RUN…you will have to heal but how can you trust him…do you really still trust him?[/i]

    ………is all speculation. Peter has no idea if this is how your boyfriend acted.

    FFS don’t wreck your life because of Peter’s standards. Evaluate the situation for yourself and make your own mind up.

    #49883
    Alf
    Participant

    Swimming – hardly feels like you’re exercising and very stimulating.

    Biking – Just really helps get me in shape quickly.

    Yoga/Pilates – fell in love with them over the past few years. Can’t believe how much they help release inner energy and strengthen the body (especially areas which have been injured)

    Weight Training – Used to really enjoy it, but a bad back and lack of value placed on self-image has meant I do it more now out of connivance (easy to do at home).

    If only I had the time/money/energy to do them more instead of drinking beer and eating cakes! lol

    #49881
    Alf
    Participant

    Personally i believe we’re all energy inhabiting a vessel which is experiencing things in order to play a part in this life, and grow for the next one.

    To translate that practically I reckon each individual has their own life meaning, and that happiness and fulfillment is usually found from following your instinct and being true to yourself. Way easier said than done though.

    Drink, sex, laughter and thrive are all good back up options though lol

    #49880
    Alf
    Participant

    Firstly stop comparing yourself and your situation with others, you’ve walked a totally different path to them to get to where you are, so thinking that you should be doing the same as they are is a bit silly really. If you’re unemployed and without a partner then that’s where you are, the fact that others aren’t there has no relevance to where you are and what you are doing.

    Secondly stop trying to think about consequences. Rejection, failure etc. – they’re only possibilities and you simply can’t live life based on what may happen, or else you will certainly miss out on what will happen.

    In the wise words of the great sage Nike, “just do it”. Whether the consequences be good or bad is irrelevant – you are in a place you don’t want to be and you need to move on, and you’ll only do that be doing things. Try not to look for peace, just look for things which you are happy with.

    #49879
    Alf
    Participant

    Firstly he sounds like someone who has a focus in life, and that focus is work. Nothing wrong with that, but if you’re to stay as his partner you will probably have to accept that such a focus is going to mean things such as these occur.

    That said, he also sounds a bit of a relationship retard not discussing such matters with you first regardless. If this has hurt/annoyed you so much let him know. It doesn’t have to result in any serious action other than him discussing future plans with you, but definitely let him know or else he may be totally oblivious to it (I once neglected my partner for several months and had no idea I was doing so until she told me).

    And don’t take it personally that he made this decision in such a way. Sometimes when you’re focused on something it’s easy to forget other things. His motivation behind all this may be to earn as much as possible so that you both have as good a life as possible (the situation I had with my girlfriend was just that – I was ploughing into work so that I could get the mortgage paid off ASAP and so that we could enjoy as much of our lives together with no serious overheads/worries, but she didn’t know that, she just thought I was neglecting her).

    Best of luck.

    #49878
    Alf
    Participant

    Big hugs Cilla.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 23 total)