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Lilly

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  • in reply to: Figuring Out The "Right" Thing to Do? #60569
    Lilly
    Participant

    Hi Trevor!
    It can be extremely tiring to try and side with both sides. I know of this from experience. You do not owe anyone an explanation of your beliefs. That’s what so great about free will is we can believe anything we wish. Deep down you know exactly what your beliefs are and the fact that you would feel annoyed when Fox News was on is how you know what your true beliefs are…by a feeling. It’s all about a feeling. What beliefs make you feel good inside? Literally, makes you feel peaceful and like you’re on the right track? Not in your head, what you “think”, but actually FEEL. You can never go wrong when you listen to you what you’re feeling bc that’s how our soul communicates with us. Another thing, don’t feel like you have to share your beliefs all the time. Even if someone asks you, you can say you don’t really feel like talking about it, or just a simple “I’m not sure at this time.” I, myself, don’t have too defined beliefs, bc I feel like beliefs are what separates us. They have become too rigid. Maybe focus on simply being and your wonderful qualities and God-given talents as a human being, instead of trying to maintain a certain belief system of making everyone happy. Take care~

    in reply to: Can I make things better in anyway? #60566
    Lilly
    Participant

    Hi Peter!
    I feel like maybe it’s a good thing that you broke up with her. Nobody is perfect and you were following your heart at that time. Do not feel guilty about anything. You can’t MAKE anyone doubt themselves. She is doing it all on her own. Sounds like she is having some inner confusion herself, that was only brought out by your actions. It was already in there, laying dormant, and sometimes things happen in order to help oneself or another deal with certain “inner demons” that need to come out and be healed. Nothing happens by mistake in life and especially this. Have confidence in your decision at that time to break things off, and approach this situation with love, only love. But try not to bring toxic emotions of guilt into the mix. We’re all on this earth learning and living through experiences just like this. It’s what we’re here for! Send her love and if you wish to try to mend the relationship, maybe refocus on why you broke it off in the first place. Perhaps, that’s where the wisdom lies.

    in reply to: Resentment? #60563
    Lilly
    Participant

    Hi Seth!
    So sorry to hear you are in a situation which to you, seems as if there is no way out, and you probably feel stuck. I have an idea of what you are feeling because I too have felt that way before with certain people in my life, whom I physically had to be around more than I wanted. What helps me when I start feeling this way is to remember a couple things. One, it’s okay that you don’t like him. That doesn’t make you a bad person, if that has at all crossed your mind. I know I can sometimes get into that mindset, thinking similar thoughts.
    Try to remember that everything is ENERGY and more than likely your energy and soul aren’t vibe’n with his. And that’s ok. The more you fight it and focus on the fact that you hate begin around him, the more intensified it’s going to get bc you’re putting all of your mental energy into it. So try and catch your negative thoughts about him, and refocus them onto something else, more positive.
    I also remember that every person and situation in our life is a lesson for us to learn. He is one of your most important teachers at this time. The hardest situations in our life are the the biggest lessons our soul needs to learn. Try to keep in mind that every single person on earth is doing the BEST they can at their current consciousness level. You never know what is going on within a person to make them act out, etc.
    If you have trouble seeing your dad in a loving light, a good exercise is to focus on something that makes your heart feel warm, whether it be another person, a pet, a project, a place, anything. Focus on that feeling of love and caring. Then, once you’re sitting with that feeling, bring your dad into your mind. And see your dad, whilst mentally sending him that love from your heart to his heart. You can even do this when he is around, even while he is being a jerk, etc. Mentally send him love. Honestly, he is making you a more loving and forgiving person. Like I said, he is your greatest teacher. But whatever you do, go easy on yourself and even if you have 1 time during the day where you held love in your heart for him, even for a second, that is a huge accomplishment.
    I’m not sure if you know who Pema Chodron is, but her books are amazing and extremely helpful. Here’s a link to her books and audio books http://www.shambhala.com/authors/a-f-1/pema-chodron.html and see if any resonate with you. Every single one I have ever read has helped me immensely…that and getting into meditation, which may help you too. Take care, take a deep breath and be easy on yourself~

Viewing 3 posts - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)