I appreciate how you still recall my previous posts btw, and part of that is perhaps true. Even though I’m in a fairly better mental position than before, there are still long term complications too which I need to deal with.

But I also think these problems are not instantly work through-able or that I still need to get my other things in life done before being able to solve more complicated things mentally step by step. It’s a weird dilemma I guess in some way.

Dear Anita,

Yes it is but also not entirely. My parents never understood me, yes. However they weren’t my only source of validation though, I’ve had and tried making a lot of friends and met a lot of people in terms of romantic relationships and that makes me feel more and more like I don’t always align with everyone in terms of how I see life as, and don’t properly match the energy of my friends.

Parents are certainly a part, but they’re just a part of it. Ultimately its from an overall experience I speak of.

Dear TeaK,

Thank you for the concern yet again, it’s relevant to more my situation where I perhaps see a deeper turn of things happening. I’ve always wanted to feel understood but I never got that, due to my parents being more goal driven and emotionally unaware. However I don’t blame them because perhaps they weren’t brought up that way and also maybe because even though they don’t understand me emotionally or can’t support it and sometimes make it hard for me with more and more responsibilities, they still provide for me in terms of basic needs. However I’m slowly shifting that as I’ve started to work myself.

At the same time my parents aswell as my brother is trying to accomplish more with their careers, however even though all of us are safe and stable, my brother’s constantly trying for a job and he’s breaking apart. Because it’s tough competition and how things are going, I really do see him trying but slowly he’s breaking apart aswell. And that just makes me break apart too.

And about other’s directly hurting me, is through my prospects in relationships, I get my trust broken every time I believe in someone, perhaps it’s misfortune but it’s not been good at all. And being sensitive as I am, it’s harder for me to overcome the hard takes and move on.