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That was a great post, you provided such a refreshing outlook on life! Also, I am so glad that things worked out for you after all!
I want you know that you are succeeding right now in this very moment by coming on tiny Buddha and being willing and able to write your thoughts down and share them with all of us. It is my belief that because of what may seem a small act, you are succeeding in beginning a journey that can lead you to inner peace. This is because you are opening up your heart, and it is very clear that you desire change in your life. That’s the first step, awareness. That awareness may be painful, it may be a bit frightening but stay strong because things will change, if you choose for them to. I can’t speak on your past, but perhaps I can address the present. I don’t have all the answers but I will humbly offer this: stay connected, keep speaking your truth, to those who you love, to the tinybuddha family. Would you mind trying something? Everyday when you wake up can you write down the first thing that pops in your head that you are grateful for? Whether it is something seemingly small: “hey the temperature in my bedroom is perfect” to the bigger picture, “I have this amazing man in my life through whom I have received the gift of love”. By writing down these things you are grateful for life, you will begin to look at your life through a lens of “wow I forgot I have all these amazing aspects of my life!” Deep within your heart and soul thirsts for this type of self love. It will gladly drink it up. Keep trucking a long on tinybuddha, it has changed my life immensely and definitely for the better. I know it will do the same for you!
Thanks Matt and Nicole!
These are great tips! I will definitely have to check out “counting breaths”
You’re welcome! I’m so happy to be there for you. I’m sending you a big hug as well 🙂
I want you to know that you are not alone. I too have recently broken up with a guy who I care deeply for. You have so many questions running through your head: Did I do too much, or not enough? Why can’t he be there for me like I’ve been there for him etc. At first all these thoughts were cluttering my brain. Making my every hour drag on through the murkiness of regret.
But, slowly but surely, by being aware of my thoughts, “catching” the negative ones and replacing them with positive ones (such as: I can grow from this experience; there is someone who is a better match for my soul who i just havent met yet!); focusing on the present moment as much as possible (taking a moment to breathe in the fresh air, notice how the sunlight falls on the trees); being with my friends and family; and simply doing things that I love to do!
Dont get me wrong, I still have my moments of bitter sweetness, of missing him. But, it is getting better. So, hang in there with me Jamie. We’re on this journey together. Remember be compassionate towards yourself. Everything happens for a reason. It just hasn’t been revealed to us yet. But, it will and when it is, it will make more than enough sense.
Thanks everyone. That was great advice.
Laney, as far as us moving closer is concerned, I was hired at an amazing job before we even started dating. Both of us are young recently out of college and as much as I love him there is no way I would have given up my job which I worked very hard to get. In fact, we knew that I would be leaving soon but, our feelings for each other grew stronger, and we tried to make it work. I really believe that at this point in my life we just aren’t meant to be together. And the hardest part is that when we were together it was the best relationship I had ever had.
Laney, I also really liked what you said about allowing myself to grieve although, I am at peace with the decision and I have accepted it, I am still letting go of something that was a huge part of my life. Often I have been ashamed that I don’t just bounce back from things. I am beginning to see there is no shame in that. That it will take some time.
I’m really happy to say that I am instead of visiting him going home for a week and being with my family and enjoying life as much as possible, I am taking the time to self nurture myself. I know that the Universe has plans for me that I don’t even remotely know about and that everything will be the way it’s meant to be. If me and him are meant to cross paths again we will and if we aren’t we won’t and that’s ok. That doesn’t change the amazing memories and lessons that I can walk away from this with.