Forum Replies Created
October 16, 2013 at 2:36 pm #43884
it saddened me to read of your very real distress but what I felt came through your words is intelligence and drive. You have detailed each of your challenges coherently which indicates they are not about to overwhelm you any time soon. What a wise decision to get out and go for a walk! I was not as sensible as you and found myself virtually unable to move for several days after a recent event. I hope that the walk helped and I wonder if perhaps that may also continue to help you as you could develop an exercise programme at home. You also have access to the Internet and wonder if maybe studying a language may be a way to spend time usefully and I imagine would also be useful in the military.
I hope that writing it out has helped and that solving your practical problems will help with your emotional ones . I also hope that knowing other people think your situation currently sucks helps too. My life experience tells me that it will get better for you and hopefully sooner rather than later.
Look after yourselfJuly 9, 2013 at 6:59 pm #38310
Yes. I think it is a self-esteem thing. There is more pleasure from seeing other people happy than trying to make yourself happy… Analysing is exhausting and leads to living in your own head and this can be self-destructive. Take time to see your good qualities and concentrate on them. Try to take every negative thought and flip it to positive. I am sure you do not need to change and no one is perfect. Accepting ourselves warts and all has to be a good thing.
You are not alone.
JoJuly 9, 2013 at 6:49 pm #38309
I have had experience of LDR’s both good, bad and heartbreaking. The only thought coming to me that I feel is valid to you is that if it is meant to be it will work out. Be careful that the relationship remains a reality. A constant flow of communication is vital otherwise your imagination will begin to begin to fill in the gaps. There are so many needs that will not be met, there is so much of your life during which you will feel lonely and sad but when you are together it will be magical. Only, very quickly followed by the inevitable heartache of saying goodbye again. In my opinion the distance must be temporary.
I wish you luck and happiness
JoJuly 9, 2013 at 1:15 pm #38283
From what I have read it seems you have made the best decision for yourself. You settled for friendship and you made the most of that but it was never enough and you have suffered enough. You are a brave lady. Having taken those first steps just keeping going and stay brave…
JoJuly 9, 2013 at 12:54 pm #38281
The spelling and grammar is awful, my apologies…July 9, 2013 at 12:08 pm #38275
I have to agree with Matt’s comment. Allowing these thoughts to stay in your head is prolonging what is clearly agony for you. It is preventing you from healing and is scarring you too – think of picking at a wound… It is not easy to say but comes from experience that you need to leave these thoughts alone in order that they can disappear from your mind for good. It is within you somewhere to find the strength that you will need to change your thought processes. Whenever ‘he’ comes into your mind think immediately of something else, something good and beautiful for example. Letting go of the thoughts means accepting it is over and that thought is excruciatingly painful. But you know that it is over, really you do… Please be strong for yourself. Do not let these thoughts waste any more of your precious life.
Also with warmth