The main reason I regret moving home is that by the time my kids reached their teens, they had began disregarding me the same way my family had disregarded me as far back as I can remember. After 3.5 years in therapy in R.I. with a therapist who was also a professor at the Univerity, and very good at his job, I thought things would be different when I moved back home. That was 27 years ago. I regre

t my decision to move home t

o my family of origin. I contin

ued counseling when contin

back in 1990. Left in 1980. There cousins, my neices and nephews, less than welcomed my kids into the fold. I was protective of my kids, spoke up about it, as I had learned to speak up of my feelings and not harbor resentment. The response from my siblings and mother was they became defensive and ganged up on me, us. My protectiveness of my precious kids whos parents just split up was met with my kids being excluded from activities. And I was horrified. Never had a thought of there being any such outcome over my expressing concerns regarding my kids adjusting to the new environment. I believed speaking up was the right thing to do. We became the topic of many of their conversations in our abscence. I tried. God knows how hard I tried to make things better. Thus the codependency crept back in to play. It hasnt been good.

Yes, I would. Im from California. Moved to Rhode Island at age 24, after married then divorced to my kids dad. He came to R.I. and we reconciled, went to remarry, divorce had not been finalized. We had out two kids. I moved back to Ca with my 3 almost 4 and 7 y.o. kids. My family of origin continued the unfair treatment I moved away from 9.5 years earlier, now including my kids in their behaviors toward us. I regretted moving home many times over the years. I had 3.5 years of individual psychotherapy before I moved home. I thought it would be different after a decade away. This was my main regret.

My friends tell me I did too much for them and they never learned to appreciate me. Grew to expect things from me. Overindulged is another I hear. I think my FEAR OF ABANDONMENT plays apart. My daughter has taken things, traumatic experiences I shared hoping it would help her understand me and go easy on me, and used the very awful things to throw in my face and belittle me. I HAVE NEVER DONE SUCH A THING TO ANYBODY, would never consider using anothers hurtful experiences to hurt them more. But she has to me several times. Why? Is she just cold and mean. She is to me.