@simpleal @smart thank you both so much for your kind words. It seems like a never ending battle sometimes and true recovery and happiness just don’t feel like an attainable goal. Today however , i am feeling positive so I have decided to just roll with it and not wait for the other shoe to drop like I normally do . I don’t know if I ever mentioned what I do for a living but I work in health care in an emergency room. I have had this job for the past 7 years now. I often feel (when I am thinking clearly) that taking care of ppl worse off then myself , sick, and sometimes dying,is the “purpose in my life” that you were mentioning.. thanks again for listening my ramble . It feels good to have my feelings validated
Lindsey

Thank you so much Matt for your kind words. I’ve actually just started knitting and crocheting . That brings me some peace in tough times . But some days are just to hard . I find myself slipping into old habits and i have a hard time stopping myself 🙁