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Rashmi

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Viewing 4 posts - 16 through 19 (of 19 total)
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  • in reply to: How to deal with extreme loneliness? #44213
    Rashmi
    Participant

    Hey you!
    I’m 25 and I can certainly relate to your experience. My first relationship (which lasted almost 4 years) ended and I was a mess. I felt betrayed and rejected. My self confidence hit rock bottom and it took me several years to build myself up. The choices I made were fueled by my fears (fear of being rejected, fear of loneliness and low self worth) caused me to make choices that were less than desirable. The fear I projected on to my world only caused everything I undesired to manifest around me. By manifest I mean, my actions were fueled by my fear and that made me behave in less than desirable ways, which inevitably pushed everyone I loved dear away from me, causing me to feel the same rejection that I feared OVER and OVER AGAIN. I was stumbling in the dark and my own limiting beliefs caused me nothing but misery. At times I thought there was something wrong with me. Until I realized that I do have a choice to believe whatever it is that I want. I can either believe all the good things about me or I can believe or the bad things about me. I also stopped looking for outside things to make me feel whole. Looking for love in all the wrong places can never end well. People are attracted to happy people. Confident people. It is because of the vibes that you give off. If your choices are fueled by fear and desperation anyone can smell it a mile away.
    We all struggle with rejection mainly because it bruises our ego. Not because it actually diminishes our self worth or who we are. Right now you’re struggling with being rejected because you let it validate you as a human being. Don’t let it this one incident define your sense of self worth.

    From what I gather in your post, you’re someone who struggles with confidence and low self esteem right? Unless you stop looking for rejection in every experience, rejection is all you’re ever going to get. Work on yourself, enjoy being alone. Be the kind of person anyone would want to be around. Here is an article I came around, I think it might help. There are more articles on this blog on overcoming negative self talk etc HOW TO GRACEFULLY RECOVER FROM REJECTION
    Hope it helps

    in reply to: I feel like I am cursed, my life fell apart #44003
    Rashmi
    Participant

    Hi Sonja

    Its okay to not want to get back together with him right now or ever. Dont feel guilty about it and certainly dont feel like you need to decide right now on what you want to do with your life and or your marriage. I suggest you take some time to yourself to figure things out. When the time is right you will know where you stand. Clearly your husband has a lot of issues he needs to deal with and its better if you let him sort it out by himself. For one, it will give him a taste of life without you. If that is what he truly wants, you need to learn to accept it and let it go. The only person you have total control over is yourself. Focus on getting yourself better. You’re strong on your own and whatever it is that you’re going through right now is temporary. Nothing in life is permanent. A few months/ years down the line you will look back at this time and will be forever thankful for what it has brought your life. I went through a similar experience a few years back and now looking back at it all, I can’t help but thank my stars for everything I went through. Like I said life has a way of unraveling itself. There is a reason why things fell apart Sonja…. You may not see it now but one day it will all make sense 🙂

    in reply to: My heart hurts #43972
    Rashmi
    Participant

    I’m sorry that you’re in so much pain but you have to realize that what this other person says or does is outside of your control. The only person you have total control over is yourself. Whenever you feel like you just cant make it, tell yourself this is only temporary. Life is fluid it flows and it is everything you make it out to be. As difficult as it maybe to see the positive side of a tragedy, force yourself to see the light. When you have the time please check out our blog http://lovingboldly.com/

    Much love and light
    Rashmi

    in reply to: I feel like I am cursed, my life fell apart #43971
    Rashmi
    Participant

    Hello Sonja!
    I’m so sorry for what you’re going through… You’re in a difficult place right now but I want you to know that you will get through this! You are not cursed, your life is not cursed. Life has a strange way of unraveling itself you just have to have faith. Sometimes things fall apart for better things to come through. That being said you can’t blame yourself for what happened, you cant blame anyone for what happened. The only person you have total control over is yourself. You can and you will get through this.

    Here is a video one of my friends Mika from Loving boldly posted about infidelity in marriages and how to survive it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r1LaoRUdG4

    Much love and light

Viewing 4 posts - 16 through 19 (of 19 total)