Thanks a lot guys for hearing me out and giving suggestions and your time!

Hi Anita, he is 30 years old and yes they had started showing him prospects of girls of his caste but he said no they even blackmailed him by saying they will stop eating if he doesnt look at the photos to that he lost his mind and said I will also stop eating then and threw his phone out of our balcony, after that episode his parents has not brought up the topic of girls till now, but they dont actually talk to him much just once a wk that too only his dad not his mum so the relationship there is already too weakened but yes he still looks at his phone whenevr he achieves any milestone, he still looks for that approval but somewhere he knows he is never going to get that!

Oops sorry, I didnt see the name! Thanks for hearing out! When I said the families are involved I meant both set of parents know about us being together, my parents are absolutely okay and happy to have him in our family since they have known him for 12 years and love him and they are also aware that his parents arent okay with this but they still are supporting us with anything and everything and have been waiting patiently for us to get married, my boyfriend also feels a part of ny family but I do feel sometimes that whatever is happening with his parents I might be at the recieving end since I am the only one closest to him, living with him 24/7 I dont think I feel any guilt because I know we havent done anything wrong, his parents havent even met me they dont even know me but still the rejection, his mom has alwsys been the one taking decisions on behalf of the family always and my boyfriend to avoid conflict has always given her an impression that she is in control of his life too which ofcourse is the biggest cause of them not accepting me! But to be in this complication, to lose one’s parents because of this is definitely heart breaking and to see him cry every now and then is also heart breaking. I felt like what if we go ahead with this and somehow I remind him of what he lost, I have already spoken to him about this and he said there is no way I will blame you or look at you as the reason for all this because the reason is only me and my parents and not you, he said he is clear about that and for the past 3 years when the parents fiasco happened we were still able to maintain the sanity in our relationship, it wasnt the same in the start he was too guilty but after few days he became normal and our relationship became the way it was, so may be I am overthinking or may be not I dont know. You said his sexual fantasy might be related to his parents stuff but he first brought this fantasy up 6 years ago when his parents knew nothing and none of the families were involved so may be its not related to his parents rejecting me. But we have had so many obstacles lately, our marriage has been postponed multiple times due to it which makes me think may be the nature is trying to tell me something or I dont know if I am doing the right thing!! Actually I dont know may be I am thinkimg too much and feel drained!

Hi Anita,

Thanks for your response. When he last brought it up we had a huge fight where I told him that he has basically disrespected me and my principles by getting this topic up again and he apologised and said these are just fantasies and he wouldnt ask me to actually go out and do it he said he just wants to play it in his head like a roleplay and he wouldn’t ask me to do anything I am not confortable with. Actually I have been with him for 12 years now and yes he hasnt forced upon any of his fantasies on me or anytime while we are having sex so I dont know if I should neglect all the good things in him and the fact that he has kept me so happy throughout 12 years or should I go ahead with not getting involved with this man at all? I am in a big dilemma because both of our families have been involved and everything. I dont think I know whats the right thing to do here and I am having sleepless nights over it.