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Dermot

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Viewing 8 posts - 1 through 8 (of 8 total)
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  • July 8, 2014 at 12:15 pm #60426
    Dermot
    Participant

    Hi guys,
    I just wanted to say thanks again, the recent advice does seem good. I like the idea of giving myself wiggle room with the i wont instead of i cant phrase.
    Also i absolutely wish i could sketch and draw but i am very bad at art unfortunately. I actually tried a little while ago drawing women, but the poor souls all came out looking like transvestites 😛

    Thank you all for caring, sorry this thread keeps getting bumped but every now and then i feel the need to come on and see what has happened to it and just cant resist but say thank you. Just tell me to stop if you are sick of it.

    Thanks again, i wish things could get better….dark days my friends, fyi still waiting on my books 😀

    June 30, 2014 at 7:28 am #59931
    Dermot
    Participant

    Thanks guys I appreciate the responses, I just ordered some books on Amazon about Buddhism and philosophy. I hope they can change my state of mind and maybe help me get motivated to try and change. I also am planning on going out to the city centre alone one of these days when i have my books and just reading them in starbucks or something so that I will at least maybe get used to being around people.

    Maybe things will change, wish me luck guys!

    🙂

    June 25, 2014 at 5:04 pm #59580
    Dermot
    Participant

    Thanks again for even more replies! However i think the problem of late is that i am feeling a sense of despair. I can’t recall if i have mentioned this or not already but i think I have Avoidant personality disorder, which means i REALLY struggle to socialize or go outside my routine.
    The reason i despair is because many say it is incurable even if you can improve. As anandita said she joined a buddhist organization and i think that is great but that is precisely the thing i can’t do.

    I can’t do ANYTHING that involves humans around me if i dont know them completely. I’m mad at myself while writing this and i feel ungrateful and selfish to see so many replies that people were kind enough to give yet i still can’t feel any better or move past it.

    So much shame….

    June 24, 2014 at 4:52 pm #59499
    Dermot
    Participant

    i appreciate all the motivational words and the help people have tried to give….but i have been having a very rough couple of days and i just dont think i can cope. this life is to hard for people like me.
    I feel like a mutation of evolution that has failed in society and so doesnt deserve a place.

    June 24, 2014 at 4:50 pm #59498
    Dermot
    Participant

    it sounds like this is a relationship you just should not be in…..imagine ten years down the road do you really think it would be a good relationship to be in if you had rocky times from day 1?

    June 10, 2014 at 11:38 pm #58594
    Dermot
    Participant

    Thanks for the tips guys, I really appreciate you just reading the post and typing up a response. It always helps to here people like you two trying to help.

    Susan I get what you mean and i am very young, however I have been like this since i was 12. I just can’t cope and year after year i thought it would change. It starts to seem hopeless now. I mean i cant think of a single memory i had outside of school in the last 8 years with friends….nothing! Its as if those years are just erased and i dont think i can change. I mean i am at the point where if i was lucky enough to be out with friends and i met a girl who was all over me and sending clear signals she wants me, i just think i would ignore them, its too terrifying to end up making a fool of myself.

    TT i appreciate your tip of exercising and am going to do the push up idea. I actually bought some stuff to work out with but have felt to depressed to do anything…it is so hard to do something with depression.

    And to both of you guys, unfortunately my list does not become as big as you would think. Besides academics (which i aint great at but at least i did something i suppose) i genuinely cant think of anything……………..at all!

    My problem feels like it borders on agorophobia sometimes….i struggle to go outside not due to the open spaces but because it is outside my routine and comfort zone and just being around people i feel out of place.

    June 10, 2014 at 11:28 pm #58593
    Dermot
    Participant

    I dont think you should worry too much, I put up a topic about how lonely I am and in it I mentioned that I didnt go to my graduation due to a social phobia of sorts. I definitely think you should just forget about how much of a big deal it seems and realize that once you have gone you will be happy with yourself. I can guarantee that.

    Plus, college is a much better experience than high school and when you are there i am sure you will make more friends, it isn’t nearly as cliquey as high school.

    Dont worry this seems like a typical situation of scary at first and happy when you actually do it. In your mind it is terrifying because you think about an awful situation and you cant do ANYTHING to stop it. But remember when you are there it will be real, and wont be worth worrying about because you can actually tackle the situation.
    😀

    June 10, 2014 at 1:39 pm #58524
    Dermot
    Participant

    Hi (My first post! 😀 )

    I think you are being a bit too sensitive. It sounds like he is trying to build you up, but you may see the fact that he says it in a dominant tone as negative. I personally think it is just his way of helping, some people are just brash with how they approach things….calling you a looser and acting inconsiderate of your dreams is just him getting his point across without thinking how it may be perceived.

    He seems to think that you might regret what you want to do later when the novelty of it has worn off and what you do for a living is not the most important thing anymore, instead family life, having good opportunities to move on and having some money to be comfortable may take precedence.

    Whether you should do sports therapy is up to you, but ignore him calling you a looser and saying things like “living in a shit are wont seem so clever”…instead focus on that one phrase that really stood out to me “you have every chance and capability to pull yourself up so much higher”….that sounds like a pretty caring guy to me, even if he puts his foot in his mouth 😉

    all the best.

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