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November 24, 2021 at 4:00 pm in reply to: Anxious Attachtment, Expectations, Art of Letting Go… #389005
Hello anita! Long time no see!
I am working on calming myself actually. I’ve been incorporating more meditation in my routine and it honestly leaves me feeling more level headed.
Haha that’s very true, i’ll still be here and living a full like, however i tend to forget that i was living fine without this person before.
Ive maybe fallen for the idea of a relationship that i fixate on a goal that may or may not happen…
Yes thank you Michelle!
I’ll be sure to let you know about work related things and problems!
thank you! I will definitely try these things at work when things get too hectic! I appreciate it your advice and I’ll make sure to come to you for any other advice!
I actually am looking now! I wouldn’t quit unless I found something that interests me. I’d really would love to step into the work of languages as a job and media as well. If I do find something better, I’d leave. I technically don’t have an obligation. I just don’t want to get into the habit of leaving jobs, you know? Although I’m nowhere near working at my career job, I feel like I’d be building bad habits at a young age by leaving fast.
But I do agree that I need to evaluate when I should stick it out and when I shouldn’t. I technically should have the right to know my scheduling, but many jobs are dishonest in that sense so I guess I’ll have to deal until I find a better place!
I appreciate your point of view and opinion!
I agree with the things you said. None of the work conditions I’m dealing with are unbearable. Not ideal- maybe. But I can deal with them. People are rude at work, but it’s not to be taken personally and I know that. So I agree that these reasons are invalid for quitting, I guess I’m trying to find a way out of a somewhat stressful situation.
I do wish my mother understood my sensitivity at times, but I know I have to toughen up in many situations. She does support me and she’s happy that I’m working and trying, but I guess she hates quitters, which I understand completely.
Honestly I agree with your point of view! Maybe if you have any advice on dealing with anxiety (when your stomach has that huge pit in it, and when your heart races extremely fast) would you give me some? I’m normally I person who doesn’t deal with anxiety (I like to stay calm) so I don’t know what to do with that feeling.
McDonalds was a good job but yes I did want to move on. So when I found the other job, what made me feel stressed and anxiety was my coworkers and managers (very stern and passive aggressive) and my boss (who was pregnant, but very catty and rude). I’ve never had to deal with that type of angry boss before, because at McDonald’s the bosses spoke kindly and made it clear of what they wanted without making you feel terrible. So, I just never felt settled at that job. I felt like an outcast slightly cause most of the employees were there for some time and I was new. And also, my management was very disorganized with schedules, and that’s another thing that set me off. I sound really picky, cause I know most jobs have inconsistent scheduling.
Aso for this job now, I got some angry coworker and negative environment vibes that I had at the last job. And I also really don’t like how my schedule isn’t accurate, because instead of doing a 6 hour shift I could be doing at 10+ hour shift, but I would only find out when I get to my shift and they tell me to stay. A lot of my coworkers deal with it though, and I know I can as well.
I guess I have to go through both the good and the bad to grow and learn. I can’t just leave after something is bad.
But I would really enjoy a job that had to do with languages and arts, since that’s what I study in school and would help me out a lot for my future career. I just can’t seem to find much of those student jobs anywhere.
I guess it would mostly be me and my mother who bring me down , if that makes sense. My mom really dislikes when I leave a job, which I understand cause I need money and it’s kind of reckless to leave a job all because there’s something you don’t like there. And I’m the second person who gets me down about jobs, I guess after speaking to my mom I started feeling guilty about disliking jobs.
I understand her point of view, because she now has a job that she really dislikes but she’s still sticking through, and if she can do that job I should be able to do mine.
yes! That seems perfectly reasonable!
I’m definitely building up the courage, and when I do so I’ll see how it goes. Thank you!
If I were to attempt at being brave, I’d maybe try to ask for some help with the subject he tutors me in, since I need someone to test me verbally with the subject. I just don’t know how to do so/ if it’d come out creepy?
Or maybe even the easy way in by following on social media, but to be honest I think face to face is the bravest but also the most effective way to approach.
Id rather do it when his friends aren’t there though, I wouldn’t want their presence to affect anything!
And I do think that approaching him just to learn how to approach and gain confidence in that field is helpful!
I do tend to overthink quite often so I agree with you on the mind reading things, it’d take forever and day to try and dissect someone’s actions, so I better stop!
I thank you for your honesty! I do agree that shyness isn’t always a reason for no interaction; it could simply just be disinterest/ indifference!
I guess it’s just the whole “what if” and being brave enough to approach someone who caught my eye is what is bugging me!
I agree that staring is kinda over doing it, and personally if they are saying things about me I’d rather know than have to think about what’s being said.
Also, he’s only going to another university, we live close to one another! So even if a friendship or anything were to happen, it wouldn’t be bad!
But thank you for the advice!
I really liked the advice and point of view you’ve given me.
I guess the negatives I see of this situation is simply just rejection. I’m not really even looking to get into a relationship so soon anyway, but I would like a chance of at least friendship! From what I’ve heard he’s very nice.
You’ve made me realize that I won’t lose much if I try it out! He could be questioning talking to me as well, or not, but even then I’ll never know till I try!
- This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by Sisi.
I agree I did a lot of the mind reading stuff, which gets me nowhere and honestly drives me crazy.
He asked me questions about my school, my past, where I was from, where I wanted to study and what I wanted to study. We were making jokes and we overall had a pretty good conversation! Even when he had to go, he was lingering on with the conversation a little more.
But yes I do see your point, if someone takes interest in you and wants to get to know you, why wouldn’t they just do it, especially if we’ve already spoken.
I use the excuse “maybe he’s too shy”, but in reality he could not be intrigued.
I guess I’m just trying to figure out if it’s even worth putting myself out there to someone I barely know, or if I should forget and move on!
I really really want to just say “screw it” and just go for itt. I guess the fact that we’re practically strangers makes it very hard!
Thank you for the advice though!