Dear Anita,

I see something. My distress is this:

Seeing something as it is in reality (annoying, not for me, upsetting) but not allowing myself to go with what I Intrinsically want to do (stop talking, step back, not engage). I don’t want to care half the time but I force myself to.

This creates distress. Just like when I was a child sensing fear from seeing how horrific my mother is but unable to escape. Same. Instead sense fear and react. Do what you want to do. There is no shoulds.