Okay, let me ask you this…. what do you think it is that is making her depressed and upset? Is it the situation you two are in or something else?

I think she is depressed because she feels like it’s not working out.  She feels like “why am I cursed” or something like that.  Between her kids always being little shits, and then mine recently bringing up the fact that they are unhappy.  Then I don’t show her what I should as a boyfriend.  A big problem is her own doing.  She snooped on my phone a while back about a message I wrote to my sister, in confidence.  About how I was feeling and how i felt about my ex (how when we were together, every time she would call, text, or whatever i would get butterflies).  So now she compares her self to her and others for other reasons.  It’s her own fault there.  She shouldn’t of snooped on my phone and read my private thoughts.

Also, her jealousy is very clearly out of control at this point. Do you think it’s likely to get worse the more you continue the relationship or do you think talking to her would make her stop being so accusatory or suspicious? Because it definitely doesn’t seem to be getting any better yet.

I really don’t ever see it getting any better.  I think too much damage has been done on my part by still keeping in contact with my ex.  Any time my phone goes off or if I don’t check in or am gone longer than she thinks i should be.. there is questions.  I honestly think she is even jealous of my kids at times..

To me, this relationship as it is seems like it’s very toxic for both of you.

I agree about this.  I don’t see it getting any better.  I really need to sack up and just tell her how i feel.  That we have gone too far in the wrong direction and that I don’t see any light at the end of the tunnel.  That I feel like I will always be watching what I’m doing and she will always be jealous or suspicious.  And then there are our kids.  It feels like there is never a time when all of our kids are happy at the same time. Not even for a moment.  As much as I do love her and her kids, there is too much drama and I feel it’s best if we go our own ways before it gets worse and way out of control.  I’m thinking I will try to talk to her this weekend.  The problem is it will probably be a while before she can move out, and I don’t know how uncomfortable things will be until then. This is such a sour pickle it sucks.  She doesn’t even start her new job until march 18th.  And with it she will only get paid once a month.  Then there is her kids.  She will have to transfer them back to their old school.  I feel so bad about all of this.  The guilt is killing me.  Like I said before, it’s almost easier for me to suffer then to put her through this.  I think If we can figure something out for her to move out, I might see about having my kids stay with their mom for a few weeks, and I get them for a day here or there on the weekends until she can leave.  I don’t know though if that would be worse or what?  I’m so lost.  This is so hard with us both having children involved and it is compounded by 1000 with her employment situation.  At least if she was making decent money and could find a place right away it would be different.