@Jay2023 it’s good to hear from you bro. Thanks for reaching out, how are you doing? Hearing from you all, always made me disconnect from my worries. I hope life’s been good for you bro.

@Rhaenys , Jay is right. Let’s not overlook how much effort and energy it took for you to work on your anxieties. It’s not an easy task at all, so well done for still believing and fighting to give yourself what you deserve. A happy and stable relationship.

@Rhaenys and @Jay2023 it’s very much appreciated that you’ve reached out. It’s been tough, when she did the test and it was positive, I’ll admit both of us were shocked, but it didn’t take long to come around and we got excited then she had started to bleed a little. She was inconsolable when she got confirmation she had miscarried and the hospital aftercare was not great.  She kept saying it was her fault and didn’t deserve a child because of her initial reaction. It happened early October so its been about a month, maybe i do need to be more patient. I’ve tried to talk to her, I’ve suggested therapy, I tried to give her space but she is a shadow of her former self. The exotic holiday idea is great we were still in our honeymoon phase but I don’t want to force her to do something she’s not ready for. At the same time I feel I lost her as well as our baby.

I know this is going to sound awful but I feel it could have been worse if we had been further down the line , had heard a heartbeat. I’ve accepted it wasn’t our time. But the idea of something like that happening again in the future is worrying because this has been hard watching someone you love shut down . I haven’t told B this. I just feel helpless.