Hi anita

Don’t thank me yet. I hope to actually achieve that goal to test my bravery. There is some uncomfortable things I want to resolve to move forward towards the goal.

Would it be ok to do the bare minimum in some cases. I am talking about work. Since, I have set a deadline, I will need to allocate more time to preparing for interviews and we are not paid by hours. I know what I am getting paid for, but there are no hard and fast rules on who does what work. I am expected to delegate to juniors but in trying to not do what my seniors did to me, I tend to be extra helpful and give away my time. And I have been given a new project and I don’t want to stress over the details too much. I feel like I gave away a lot of my time and energy to this company until now so it is ok for me to lower it in terms of priority and put myself first which I haven’t done in those years. It is not in my nature to completely slack off or be clueless about a project but I now want to reduce the extra work I did which was always taken for granted. It may seem odd that I’ve typed so much out for this, but as you know I have a fear of being treated as incompetent and also being disliked by people, and it is likely that they are stopping me from making this decision. So I wanted to run it by you. Does it make sense to deprioritize work? There is nothing set in stone on what overperforming or underperforming looks like. I will do as I am told to do. All these years I felt small when someone had to ask me to do something. I want to embrace that. Does that make sense?

This would give me time and help me shift my energy away from work. Focussing on work depleted me of so much. I want to take some of it back. And I am ready to reframe if it feels like this will have negative consequences. But for now, this is what I want to do. It is too many things to worry about otherwise.

Health and love is what I want to focus on.

Girija

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by samy.
• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by samy.