Dear Tee,

How are you feeling today?

Have you already visited the doctor?

I like the quote, but it’s apparently not something that Buddha said, but Charlie Chaplin. I hope it’s still true

Lol I think I read it in some article like years ago since then I was like it’s Buddha who said this but thanks for clarifying

 kind general seems like a perfect candidate for a positive father figure

Yup Definitely. I love the way he mentors his nephew (Prince Zuko), My fav scene is when Uncle Iroh says to his nephew “IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO LOOK INWARD AND START ASKING YOURSELF THE BIG QUESTION: WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT DO YOU WANT?” because his Nephew wanted a validation and respect from his father (Fire Lord) so he thought The mission his father gave it’s his destiny, and he was working so hard towards it. So that’s why Uncle Iroh also tells him “THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH A LIFE OF PEACE AND PROSPERITY.”

as long as you don’t put yourself in a high-risk situations, like climbing high mountains in winter, or climbing frozen waterfalls (an acquaintance of mine is doing just that!).

I think little risk taking is good for that adrenaline to go on sometimes. Just to makes me feel more alive. Climbing frozen waterfalls?? Well that does sound tricky. Have you tried anything like that before?

I wonder how safe and comfortable you felt in your previous relationships? I mean, did you feel you can be yourself completely or you felt you needed to pretend in some way?

I wouldn’t say 100% safe. Because I did had trust issues and I wouldn’t just open up to anyone. So it was like being comfortable as the time goes. But in my first relationship I did feel like I had to pretend the strong and understanding type in every way possible.

But being totally yourself in the starting is even possible? You know what I mean? It’s just not easy to describe

You talked about the pattern that you’ve noticed in yourself: that at first you might like her “a lot”, write poems etc, and then if she reciprocates, you get cold feet, i.e. you start feeling trapped. So if this is your pattern, you might end up moving on even if you really like the girl in the beginning. What I am trying to say that if you don’t work on your fear of intimacy, you might be repeating the same pattern again and again…

Right I know I have to work on my fear of intimacy.. maybe that’s why I don’t feel so deep in relationships? But like what could be other options available for me? I mean for experimentation like without being with someone how can I work on fear of intimacy? And it’s not like I’m already planning to find a life-partner. You can take this as like fear of commitment too 😆

Hm.. if I understood your pattern well, you get attached very quickly (writing poems etc), but then you get afraid of your attachment (and I guess your strong feelings for the girl), and you start feeling trapped. You don’t want to feel so dependent and needy, and so you start cooling down and distancing yourself? At least that’s how I understood you so far.

Ohh I haven’t thought of it this way… But it could be..