Hi Tee,

You mean you wrote a reply 2 weeks ago, but never posted it? Because you felt some resentment or discomfort? You’re welcome to tell me more, if you’d like to…

Jap, I felt disconnected. I have day’s or times where I retreat into myself and I struggle to reach out. It feels like a stone on my heart, it’s harder to give love and share/show myself and also I got and still am sick :-/

Hmm, I’ll have a sense of accomplishment of something that is important to me. You know the Maslow hierarchy of needs? I feel accomplishing this goal would meet my need for self-realization. Maybe I am wrong, but this is how I feel 🙂

And I’ll know that I’ve met it, because there are some concrete milestones I’d like to achieve…

Yes, I know it. Are you saying that you wanna reach this goal cause it expresses values you want to see in the world?

Oh interesting… so praying for you feels like not talking to anyone, whereas speaking to your inner child feels like talking to someone?

Yeah, this is exactly how it feels. Praying feels bigger.

You mean that when you pray for something, you feel you’re attached to the outcome? And it gives you a feeling that something is wrong or missing in how things are right now? And when you let go of that attachment, when you just patiently wait and trust that it will happen, then it does happen eventually?

I think/feel praying is without attachment to the outcome. It’s not easy to put in words. I’d say it’s knowing while not knowing how/what at least in the beginning. I think that’s why it’s helpful to differentiate needs from the strategies to meet the need. I wanna pray for the need.

Let me see if I understood you correctly: so your experience is that when you patiently wait, things work out by themselves? And so you’re not motivated to take action?

Can you give me an example (if you feel comfortable) of a situation where things just worked out by themselves, without you needing to take any action?

I feel like I wanna take action and do this and that and that it will have severe impact on my life if I do not take this action.

Yeah, like I wanted to reply here and my mind was like now, now, now you have to do it. It can be painful to not do things. I feel helpless. It’s hard for me to let people wait. I usually know my things I don’t forget.
Anyhow I figured if I really wanna do it I will do it. I’ll do it without effort but I have to wait for it. Often I can’t do it any other way it’s just too painful.