Posts tagged with “wisdom”
Are You Limited by the Fear of What Other People Think?
“It is not uncommon for people to spend their whole life waiting to start living.” ~Eckhart Tolle
A few months ago, I found myself on the busy streets of London’s Covent Garden.
It was a mild Friday evening in the capital and the masses were out celebrating the end of the working week, looking forward to the weekend ahead.
But that’s not why I was there.
I’d come to Covent Garden on that day for a special project.
For most of my life, the fear of what other people thought of me had kept me trapped. It had prevented me …
Burn Away Your Barriers to Love: 7 Ways to Live a Beautiful Life
“Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ~Rumi
My grandmother is nearing the end. She’s had a good life, a family, a loving husband, dancing and singing, growing things, running a business.
There are some skeletons in the closet though; her early life had some very heavy experiences that made her afraid and may have held her back. On balance, a great life, but there were challenges.
Right now, she’s slipped into a dream world and she is often still there when her …
Recognizing and Overcoming the Fears That Make Us Settle
“Fear, uncertainty, and discomfort are your compasses towards growth.” ~Celestine Chua
Settling feels awful. Take it from me—for the past few months I’ve been holding the Scepter of Settling in both my personal life and my business.
And it hasn’t felt good.
The other morning, as I sat waiting in LaGuardia Airport to board a plane for a three-day intensive business retreat in North Carolina, I had this sudden, radical a-ha! moment in which pieces of my life, both personal and business, just clicked into place.
Have you ever had that happen to you?
I realized I was settling in …
7 Things to Remember When You Think You’re Not Good Enough
“We can’t hate ourselves into a version of ourselves we can love.” ~Lori Deschene
Sometimes I am really terrible to myself, and I relentlessly compare myself to other people, no matter how many times I read or hear about how good enough or lovable I am.
On an almost daily basis, I meticulously look for evidence that I am a nobody, that I don’t deserve to be loved, or that I’m not living up to my full potential.
There is generally a lot of pressure to “stack up” in our culture. We feel as if there is something …
How to Reduce Stress and Focus More on What Truly Matters
“Beware the barrenness of a busy life.” ~Socrates
Did you ever wish you could just take off from work and get away from it all?
This past summer I had the opportunity to do just that.
I was wrapping up a twenty-four-year career in the Air Force and had saved up two months of vacation time. So my wife and I decided to visit Rio de Janeiro and live by the beach.
The tropical weather was everything you would expect it to be: sunny, warm, and gorgeous.
But surprisingly, the time off gave me so much more.
Being away from …
5 Questions to Discover Who You Are and What Will Make You Happy
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” ~E.E. Cummings
At twenty-five I was happily married and had a great career, many friends, and lots of money. During that time I also became deeply depressed, was put on medication for anxiety, and entered what would be a very long relationship with psychotherapy.
It was a real struggle for me to understand why I wasn’t happy when I had everything that I thought was important in life. Was I selfish? Were my expectations too high? I honestly couldn’t understand what was missing and …
A Simple, Tiny Exercise to Help You Make a Big Change
“Change is inevitable. Growth is intentional.” ~Glenda Cloud
Growing up, I never had that many friends. The concept of best friends is still foreign to me. For the first seventeen years of my life, I found myself happier alone than in the presence of other people.
I wanted to join them; I just didn’t know how.
In order to protect myself from people I’d rather not mention, I decided to join a karate class. For the first time I belonged to a group that was slowly starting to accept me.
In the months that followed, I began to go out …
How to Maintain Healthy Habits and Stop Sabotaging Yourself
“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~Buddha
About two years go, I felt horrible about myself and where I was in my life: single, struggling to lose weight, miserable in my job (and no clue what to do about it), and unfulfilled in general.
I kept trying to bully myself in order to be the person I wanted to be and have the things I wanted to have.
I kept saying to myself, “I can’t believe you said/ate/did that. There’s something wrong with you” and giving myself strict rules to follow, …
Why We Don’t Do What We Want to Do and How to Start
“If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse.” ~Unknown
“The truth is,” she said, “if you can’t put fifteen minutes a day into your art, then you’re making an excuse.”
I squirmed in my seat.
It was February 1, 2011, and I was on the phone, interviewing Michele, a professional artist and artist’s mentor, for an online course I created.
Michele was sharing what she tells the artists in her mentorship program who complain of not having enough time to do their art. Her words were intended for her mentees, but …
5 Ways to Seize the Moment and Live Without Regrets
“Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence, and face your future without fear.” ~Unknown
Samara is my colleague at work. She is one of the most pleasant ladies I know. She always has a smile and an encouraging word to give.
She really is the kind of woman you want to speak to on the days you feel like life has dealt you a bad hand, because she always has something comforting to say. As we got closer, I confided more and more in her about the challenges I was going through in my life.
I envisioned …
How to Improve Your Relationships and Make a Kinder World
“If you propose to speak, always ask yourself, is it true, is it necessary, is it kind.” ~Buddha
I once attended a lecture given by a world-renowned expert on post-traumatic stress disorder. The lecture made two points that I have never forgotten. I call them “brain tricks.”
1. Given a choice, our primitive brain will naturally select for the negative. It’s a survival thing.
2. When in crisis, the part of our brain that conceptualizes time and space goes off line. In other words, our brain increases the urgency of the problem by making us think the crisis will never …
Things Will Never Be Perfect: Making Peace with Everyday Challenges
“Serenity comes when you trade expectations for acceptance.” ~Unknown
A few weeks ago, I walked into my studio apartment and found it quite messy, which isn’t that hard to do with 325 square feet shared by a couple.
I’m talking clothes on the floor, dishes on the couch, and paper strewn everywhere. It had been one of those weeks where both my husband and I were ripping and running, having little to no time to manage household chores.
I looked around, took a deep breath, and sat down on the couch after moving some papers. I enjoyed some dinner with …
How to Feel at Home Wherever You Are
“Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home.” ~Basho
For over three years, I’ve been living out of a suitcase and traveling around the world doing a combination of volunteering, housesitting, and couch surfing.
This journey started after I decided to drastically change my life. In the span of a week, I filed for divorce, quit my high-paying job in New York, left my PhD program at an Ivy League school, sold all my stuff, and flew to South America.
After spending six months volunteering in Brazil, I began to realize that, while I was born and …
How to Embrace Your True Beauty (Not the Media’s Ideal)
“Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart.” ~Kahlil Gibran
A few years shy of my fiftieth birthday, I went on a road trip with one of my best friends from high school. We’d taken some version of this trip many times during our teens and twenties, but as we started raising young children, we didn’t have much time for getaways.
But on this occasion, our kids were old enough to fend for themselves, and we hit the road with same excitement and silliness that characterized all of our youthful adventures.
We spent the next …
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine.