Hello Anita. Thank you for letting me know I’m noticed here.

Sincerely, I was very tired this week, with problems and stress from work, so I didn’t post on weekend. I don’t like when I say something and don’t do it (I’m trying not to do that, as much as possible), but I was sleeping a lot and relaxing. And posting here, and also on other topic takes time, because I need to carefully read other replies and then focus on mine. I know you’ll understand.

I guess you’ve been reading other topic too? I think I felt reading about other people experiences in break up and talking with them will help.

So my update… I admit  this winter and spring were not the best in my life.. With COVID, and everything closed, I felt kind of sad many times. I think I craved for connecting and meeting new people and couldn’t have it. But it may be for better, as I haven’t rushed into anything either.

I actually connected a lot with my parents. Mom is such a support, and I also connected with my dad. I feel like he had problems last autumn too, and now he overcame them, and is much calmer and really patient, and he also helped me and supported me a lot. I know you wrote I should go away (I got that advice in other thread too) but I don’t want to. I want to be close to them and I also love this town where I am now. Also, because I know many people here, meeting new ones is much easier, than it was to me when I was living in bigger city alone.

Now that is summer and things are opening, we started going out and hanging out more and I’ve been called on a few dates. And I admit it’s scary to me. I’m thinking about giving therapy another go this fall. I guess this was expected.
I however do recognize I’m not rushing now. Actually I think I’m too careful now, and when I get called on a date, I immediately star thinking of problems (we are not compatible because…). And if I find a guy interesting, and he shows interest too, then I feel scared even more.

I know that is fear, and I realize now I do have problems with that fear and it won’t go away until I deal with it, whether I’m in a relationship or not. So I’m trying to find a way to do that.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by Rhaenys.