Me: earlier this very day (this Wed), way before your recent post of 16 minutes ago, I thought about asking how you’re doing, and this very evening I get your message, which I can’t read in a focused way because, well (intoxicated). I will be back to you Thurs morning.

anita

Dear Me

I am sorry that your father has terminal cancer ( I looked after my mother at home up to a few weeks before her passing from cancer) my relationship with her had been rocky in the past,  I managed to put aside our past hurts.  I was with her when she passed peacefully.

My comment on this is not meant to be a critisim So I must live it by getting into extremly good shape, make as much money as I can and experience life.  Any statement using words like extremely can cause oneself a problem ie. if you dont meet the high standard of extremely fit how are you going to feel about yourself? Money does not necessarily equate to happiness ( how many rich & famous people have committed suicide or drank & drugged themselves to death). Would you be willing to compromise your health, friends and or ethics to get rich? What kinds life experiences are you looking for?

I pray that your father has a peaceful & pain free passing and that you go on to have a happy & fulfilling life.

Kind regards

Roberta

How are you me, and how is your father?

anita

Dear me:

Thanks for the update. I hope your father continues to improve and has more good days ahead. Belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you too!

I’m sorry to read about your colleague. It’s understandable to have mixed feelings about it.

“(He) changed his life for her (big mistake, do it for you not anyone else)… I don’t feel bad for him, maybe a little sad? but his blood line suffered far worse then him getting to this point and he commits suicide because of a girl? really?”-

– I can understand why you might feel conflicted about your colleague’s situation. It’s tough to process such a tragic event.

It’s clear that you have strong feelings about making life changes for oneself rather than for someone else. That’s an important point, and it’s true that self-worth and personal growth should come from within. Relationships can be incredibly powerful, but they shouldn’t define our entire being.

I also get that it might be hard to fully empathize with his decision, especially considering the hardships his family has faced. Suicide is often driven by overwhelming pain that might not be apparent to others, including family members, friends and work colleagues.

When a family (like your colleague’s family) has been dealing with significant hardships, they might be so overwhelmed by their own struggles that they might not notice or understand the pain of an individual member of th family. It is possible that your colleague’s family has been so focused on their own pain and coping mechanisms that they missed signs of distress in your colleague.

It is possible that your colleague didn’t want to burden his already-suffering family with his problems, and so, he felt very isolated and alone, lacking the emotional support he desperately needed.

Reads like the emotional pain from his girlfriend’s betrayal and loss was so overwhelming that it clouded his judgment. In such a state, a person might feel that their suffering is unbearable and that there’s no way out.

Maybe he believed that his family would be better off without him, even though this was not true. This distorted thinking can prevent a person from fully understanding the impact of their actions on others.

In moments of extreme desperation, a person might feel that ending one’s life is the only way to escape one’s pain, not being able to see any other options or solutions.

While suicide might seem like a selfish act, it’s important to understand that the person is not thinking clearly. They are not intentionally trying to hurt their loved ones; rather, they are trying to escape their own unbearable pain. It’s a tragic and misguided decision, not a reflection of their love or care for their family. Understanding these factors can help us approach the situation with empathy and compassion.

Let’s all remember to be kind and supportive to those around us. You never know what someone might be going through.

I am sending you strength and understanding during this time and hoping to read from you again, anytime.

anita