The car goes were the eyes go. When a car enters a spin and your eyes stay fixed on the tree by the side of the road your afraid of hitting that is exactly what you will hit. The car goes were the eyes go.

In this moment of time and space you can’t take your eyes off the memory of your mistake and so that is where your car/self goes. By focusing on this memory you intensify it and give it power. You are not required to be perfect, your are not expected to forget but you are expected to learn and in learning grow.

We are more then the sum of our parts, more then the things that we think or the things that we do. We make mistakes and hopefully we learn and then we do better. Learn better do better what more can we ask of ourselves. If someone close to you made the same error in judgment would you continue to define them by that single event for the rest of their life? We are asked to love our neighbor as our selves but often some of us treat others much better then they treat themselves. In this case it may be appropriate to love yourself as you would love others.

Hi keyinneed,

I promise you every person on the planet over the age of twelve has looked at inappropriate stuff on purpose before. Even the girls. The kids (and especially the adults!) who think you’re bad are projecting their own shame onto you. Why should you be different than anybody else? Stop being a scapegoat, especially in your own mind. If anyone mentions it again (they won’t, and if they do, that’s the problem) say, “You aren’t over that yet?” or “Oh yeah I forgot all about that! They should really have better security on the school computers, jeez!”

Have a Happy New Year!

Inky