Anita, hi! I just so happened to received and read the email that tinybuddha.com sent me as an update to this thread that I commented on 3 years ago.

I read some of your comment and Anita I just want to say to forgive yourself. It is not the end of the world and you are not a horrible person, you simply grew up and now can see even more than before and understand even more than before.

Deserves celebration not flagellation!

I understand the feeling you’re having, I’ve also had it when I had a few recognitions and realizations of myself or my behavior at various times and it is indeed humbling.

Let your heart be mended by this humbleness. Forgive yourself!

There’s been times when others did that same thing with you, life is like this. We just live and learn and when we know better we simply do. And till we don’t, we don’t.

Love you girl, my fellow human sister!

Sending much much love your way radiating joy and gentleness!

May you be gentle and kind to yourself today, tomorrow and always!

The Universe just wanted to tell you through me to be even more kind and gentle and compassionate with yourself, clearly!

I don’t ever receive emails from tinybuddha.com so this is indeed a tiny miracle. As soon as I saw your message I felt a pang that directed me to say “tell her to forgive herself, remind her of her own divinity and humanity and that it’s okay to be on the path and no one ever gets it done completely, we always keep learning.”

I’ve been the Universe’s post girl a few other times. For whatever reason this thread has been lit up again, it is certainly for something beneficial at this point in time.

Maybe it’s for even more people than me and you!

Maybe someone needs a gentle reminder that tiny miracles exist! ❤️

Maybe someone needs a gentle reminder that it’s okay to grow and learn and still love yourself through it all. We’re all in the mud figuring it out! 💃

Anita you are touching my heart. I do not think you realize how amazing it is that you saw things even more clearly than before, that you felt what you said wasn’t in alignment anymore with who you have become now and who you are becoming…and you actually took the time to write that right under that same post. Almost 3 years later!!!

You are someone who admitted a “wrong” and through that caused this tiny miracle to happen. You are amazing, God i hope you know that!! Truly, all the respect in the world your way. To actually see ourselves and not only admit it to ourselves internally but also go public with it so that things may be rectified…what a beautiful soul you are and what a beautiful heart you have!

These are truly amazing qualities and you are an amazing human being who is growing and evolving! I am much the same as you and i am sure many more such humbling moments will happen for both of us. You had the courage of a lion this time, I want you to know that!

Please be proud of yourself and of your childhood self who had to endure all that it had to endure…and yet despite all that, look at her today! She is growing into a beautiful human being with heart and soul in spite of all the hardships and blocks on the way or that others threw her way.

As you said, between cognitive healing and emotional healing… emotional healing is the one that transforms. Through this gesture I think you started a whole transformation process of yourself that will by the end of it leave you feeling lighter, more at ease and more like who you really are. You will be closer than ever to “home”. That special feeling in ourselves when things just click and they are just right. That is also the feeling of love the way I know it.

Much much much much muuuuuuuuuch love your way! You are amazing.

You are full of heart, Lella!

Your words, your sentiment, are reaching me deeply. Thank you 🙏

At first, earlier this morning, wen I saw that you posted, and befote reading your post, I felt some sort of fread, bracing myself for some criticism & anger-

Not because you expressed criticism and anger at me, but because this is what my mind- body learned to expect growing up (or as I prefer to say because it’s more accurate, growing in, inward):

Any and all expressions of affection- or what looked/ sounded like affection- were always followed, sooner or later, by criticism, accusations, shaming & guilt- tripping.

Next, I allowed myself only to read a bit of your post, a bit of the beginning and a bit of the end, and saw that it was definitely very positive.

Yet, I couldn’t read all of it, still scared.

The fear has nothing to do with who you are, and everything to do with who my mother has been.

Next, I replied to another member because I was not afraid there.

Next, I was afraid that you will get upset that I did not reply to you first. And somewhere along the way, I was afraid that I will not match your warmth, disappoint you, and therefore, bring about criticism.

Finally, I bought myself some time in my first, short reply right above.

The healing part in all this is that I am NOTICING all this in real- time. Writing this to you is part of my healing.

It does indeed take courage, but it also takes a compassionate, wonderful person on the other side of the phone screen.

Getting closer to home, as you defined it, Lella😊

✨️🌿✨️ Anita

Roberta, thank you so much for your kind words 😊. I appreciate your light‑hearted encouragement and the warmth behind it.

🌿✨🤍 Anita