Does life perceivable get worse as you get older?

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This topic has 3 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 4 months ago by Hana L.

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August 10, 2017 at 9:46 pm #163380

dreaming715
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I’m 28-years-old and every year of my life has seemingly gotten “worse.” I know this is a dramatic thing to say, but hear me out. The high point of my life was from 18-23 (college years). Even though I was balancing a rigorous schedule and a part time job and completely broke- I was so HAPPY. Since then I have been diagnosed with a chronic illness, gone through a major break-up (a broken engagement), been stuck in a job for 4 years and every interview elsewhere has ended in being declined, I currently live alone, I’m trying to manage my chronic illness with my doctors along with the sadness that comes with it, I’m estranged from my toxic mother, and I’m broke. No savings, no retirement fund, nothing.

Some days I feel like life has gotten too difficult and I want to quit, but obviously I can’t. I just have to keep living in this confusing, sad, tangled web called “life.”

I have been in a relationship for a year and I love my current boyfriend very much. He honestly has kept me going and encouraged me a lot. I’m afraid of losing him every day, but while we’re in each other’s lives, I’m thankful.

I’m trying to find a counselor again. Just feeling lost and sad about my current circumstances.

August 11, 2017 at 5:14 am #163398
Inky
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Hi dreaming715,

I think it all has to do with perception. People tend to romanticize “the good old days”. For you that was college. Now, while you were in college, you may or may not have perceived it as “the golden age” at the time.

Who knows? Years from now you may remember this time as “Remember when I was in that crappy job and tried so desperately to get out of it, but now I love it, and how we were so broke and they didn’t have the medical advancement on the chronic illness yet? OMG, those were the days! What a party! What a party!”

Life might conceivably get worse as we get older. Me? I don’t want to know, myself. I do know I’ve been through some “What was THAT all about??” hardships in my life and that everything is good-ish NOW (with the help of The Man Above, if you know Who I mean).

Continue to find the good in any little thing you can. (Helps me!)

Blessings,

Inky
- This reply was modified 7 years, 4 months ago by Inky.
August 11, 2017 at 9:54 am #163456

Anonymous
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Dear dreaming715:

My answer: my life has gotten better as I am getting older. When I was young I looked better, I suppose. But I felt worse. Life being good or not is an experience in between-the-ears, made possible by that magnificent organ, the brain. This is where “life perceivable” takes place and it is possible to be in pain in any life circumstance. And then, it is possible to be in peace at many circumstances.

anita

August 11, 2017 at 6:24 pm #163556

Hana L
Participant

Hi Dreaming715,

I’m the same age as you are, and I’ve been through some ups and downs in my life (mainly the adult part of it), and when I reflect on my schooling years I thought high school life was the best for me simply because I could juggle studies, sports and art at the time (despite there being major exam stress). At present, as a working adult I am struggling to study part time, work full time (although my job’s currently a contractual basis so no stability there yet), and sort out some other personal stuff.

Like Inky has said, it has to do with perspective. When I reflect on my life (and I reflect more frequently when there are major stressors in my life), I have to realize that when we grow older we do learn new responsibilities which make us have to reorganize our life in a new way. So I am a work in progress.

Some days, like you, I get overwhelmed and feel like I need to “quit” too but I tell myself that I have yet to achieve my goals (and prove some naysayers wrong). Like you, I have had a string of job interview rejections. Over the years I have collected inspirational things to motivate me to get through my life’s stressors, and I keep two journals (one for me to just purely vent, and the other is a gratitude journal).

Take care!

Hana
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