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Friends Letting Me Down on My Birthday

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  • #119236
    claref
    Participant

    Hi All.

    I have a mix of friends, not just one group. I live about an hour away from my friends, so most things we do are organised in advance.

    It was my birthday on Saturday and I had a meal/drinks back in my hometown, so all my friends who lived there could make it. The friends I have who live about 1hr away from my hometown couldn’t make it as they had ‘other plans’.

    Then when i look on facebook, the plans they had weren’t actually what they had planned and they were doing other things. For instance one friend said she was going to London to visit family, then on Facebook i see she is 5 mins from her home in Manchester at a comedy night.

    I understand that to get to my meal is an hours train away. However this particular friend travels all over, London, Wales (at the weekend to see family/friends) which is a lot further than coming to mine. So I was a bit disappointed as it felt like she just couldn’t be bothered. I haven’t said anything as i am hurt.

    My other friend same as above, but she didn’t even text me to say Happy Birthday!

    They are both coming to mine in December, so I am really confused.

    My partners brother and fiance didn’t even acknowledge my birthday either – which i am quite shocked about. I have left it a few days, but still nothing… I have even put up pictures on facebook and they have been on facebook and not said anything. I spoke to his fiance the day before my birthday and told her what i was doing.

    I guess – this is why I am losing interest in friends..

    #119239
    Sumudu
    Participant

    Hi claref
    Happy Birthday!

    Hope every birthday you have be a happy one, with or without people there to help you celebrate. The greatest gift you can give yourself on your birthday is happiness of just celebrating it with the one and only person who was there with you every minute and everyday of your life – and that is you.

    • This reply was modified 7 years, 5 months ago by Sumudu.
    #119245
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear claref:

    The friends and acquaintances that let you down, make sure they don’t let you down again by expecting the same lack of acknowledgment in the future. Their behavior is information for you to take in, process and change your expectations of them, change maybe, the title in your mind, from “friend” to an acquaintance…?

    anita

    #119246
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi claref,

    As we get older birthdays (unless it’s a decade birthday) matter less and less. That’s just the reality. Also, as we get older, travelling becomes more and more tiring. Add kids, life, etc. So if I have a dozen friends from far and wide, that’s travelling once a month to someone’s party. I can’t go on. LOL!

    Because I’m married, I only expect my DH to acknowledge it. We go out for dinner and a movie. Unless I turned thirty or forty. Then it was a Big Deal. I also treat myself to something I really want, go someplace special, or do something fabulous.

    People stink!

    Treat yourself!

    Blessings,

    Inky

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