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How can I control my anxiety??

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  • #47280
    Emily
    Participant

    Hi,

    I would like some advice about how to control my anxiety. I have been a worrier for as long as I can remember, I think it started when I was a teenager.

    I seem to get anxious about the future and the constant uncertainty of life. I want everything to be perfect, which I know is impossible. I have high expectations and can get disappointed and negative very easily.

    I am currently taking medication and I am having counselling. I don’t really feel any of it is working, but maybe that’s because I am feeling negative at the moment.

    I have a wonderful boyfriend who is patient, kind and loves me unconditionally it seems. It’s hard for me to see why at the moment. I am scared that I am never going to be able to control my mind and that he will get fed up and leave me. I know that it is all down to me but why does that make it so hard to start???

    I really don’t know what to do anymore-my counsellor suggested Mindfulness as a good technique. Does anyone agree?

    I would be grateful for any advice or to hear about other people’s experiences. I just feel so alone with this.

    Am I going crazy??

    #47282
    Joseph
    Participant

    Hi Emily,

    Holidays can be an extra stressful time, not sure if that plays a factor or not.

    Working through your e-mail backwards I don’t think you are going crazy.

    Mindfulness is a good technique, good advice from your counselor however what was their particular method of instruction for you? Did they give you a worksheet, recommend a book etc… Knowing what to do is nice, but you need the how to go along with it.

    You are very lucky to have a patient boyfriend. But you also seem to have some concerns (i.e. he will eventually leave). My advice, tell him what you are feeling and your fears and hear what he says. Then you won’t need to speculate, you will know that he will stay with you even if you do get nervous sometimes etc…

    Depending on the type of counseling and your individual needs its not uncommon for progress to be made starting within a year. If your individual challenges are less severe you might expect to feel that you are making some progress within a couple of months. How long have you been tackling this with this particular counselor?

    Everything you speak of is super common in terms of what people concern themselves with and I think your counselor, patient boyfriend and helpful individuals (like those on this site) will speed you on your way to quickly feeling better about things.

    #47284
    lifeimprovement911
    Participant

    Hi Emily,

    You are stronger then you think,

    Uncertainty is the fact of life.
    The key to good-feeling life lies in cherishing the moments we have in appreciation to make every moment count.

    We humans have the power to direct our thoughts to events and objects that create a positive feeling in us as a response.

    The simple exercise that can move you into a better feeling place is to look around you find objects that bring a good feeling in you. Think about a person or objects that makes you feel really good and write everything you appreciate about it, the positive aspects of it and the positive feelings that it generates in you, be it present, memory or fantasy.

    I had once a very negative experience and when I came home my mind kept returning to the event…
    knowing that I can choose how I feel, I just looked around and focused on a wooden dresser in my room and started to appreciate, saying: “I really love my dresser, all the space I have in there, the beautiful wood-grain, amazing what this dresser actually represents, the many people who were involved in the process from growing the tree ………..” and I kept going just to keep my mind of the unpleasant thought and it worked.
    Later on when my thought slipped to the unpleasant memory of this one disturbing event I noticed it immediately and used the same technique to get onto a positive thought-spin.

    You have the power to choose how you perceive your life-experience.
    Choose to accept what is and set your direction toward improvement.
    Much Love to you:)

    #47353
    B.Bells
    Participant

    I use to have the very same problems as you , overwhelming anxiety . How busy are you in life ? I was not working at the time and in a very unhealthy relationship that only further diminished my self worth . When I simply got busy (as in finding fulfilling work) and fostered meaningful relationships my anxiety went away . Do you have close girlfriends, participate in hobbies and pursue passions ? I hope you have more than your boyfriend .
    There all all types of techniques out there but sometimes people overlook the simple and obvious . If you are just busy , especially pursuing what you love whether a plethora of healthy relationships , pursuing hobbies/passions and this is the kicker : finding Meaning Work , you will be way to exhausted in a good way to give any care to imaginary anxieties. I have been there and my crippling anxiety is now gone and I have Way More self-esteem then in those days . Mind you it takes time , hard work, patience and preserverance .
    Find your Bliss and your life will turn around . Faith also helped me .
    Best of Luck 🙂

    #47651
    Mark
    Participant

    Emily,
    What I find useful is meditation. How I do it is to allow my anxiety when I meditate. I accept it. I sit with it. I breath into it. This helps.

    Another thing that cured my anxiety is an energy healing process called Body Talk. This is a true miracle for me. I find my anxiety gone which is amazing since I was dealing with loss of my livelihood.

    Let me know if you want more information on Body Talk.

    Metta,
    Mark
    @markwillhelp.com">mark@markwillhelp.com

    #48292
    Keri
    Participant

    Hi Mark… I sure would like some information on Body Talk please… Thanks kindly… Keri

    #48295
    Mark
    Participant

    This is a YouTube by my BodyTalk practitioner

    Here is Sid’s website http://www.synergywellness.org/

    I believe that she does distance sessions.

    Let me know what happens.

    Mark

    #48341
    Keri
    Participant

    Thank you Mark:))

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