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How should i trust u..my frnd

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  • #64210
    Purpose
    Participant

    Hello.everyone
    Today i m very depressed, i have been trying and doing all the things to keep my life on track but can’t help this relapse!
    i have lost few friends in these two years..My childhood friends who were very close to me have moved to another country ..recently an aquaintence who had become a very good friend has abused me and our friendship is over(i had discussed here ..he was only interested in being in relationship and not friendship).
    I am very honest ..trust me i give my 100% to the person.. but somehow im not able to maintain any friendships… i dont know why my efforts are going in vain… I m not like this ,but im becoming very introvert and not able to welcome new people..who are potential friends.. Im feeling very low..very depressed.. i have never been this low..i have always liked talking with people..interacting…but now due to my past experinces .. i need to get out of this fear of my past.. i have been trying so hard to br positive and practicing mindfullness..but m not able to sustain..
    please help me..

    #64211
    Big blue
    Participant

    Hi Purpose,

    I’m sorry for your suffering. I’ve been down before, so I know….

    Can you Skype with your childhood friends, say on birthdays, major news, an occasional Hi?

    When you say 100%, what do you mean? Balance is good. Not saying this is you, but I know sometimes when I give too much and the reciprocity is not there, I keep going and can develop resentment or false expectations, which hurts rather than helping.

    When you say very honest, what does this mean? Can you give an example or two? Because we care, we sometimes speak out. However, are we listening twice as much as we speak? Asking questions and learning about people is also a high value exercise or trait, to be interested in others for who they are.

    Big blue

    • This reply was modified 9 years, 7 months ago by Big blue.
    • This reply was modified 9 years, 7 months ago by Big blue.
    #64427
    Purpose
    Participant

    Hi @Big Blue.. Thanks for writing…i felt great when i read..atleast you showed some kindness ..im really Thankfull to you
    i have been really very depressed all these days..and i dont know how to stop being negative.. i have never been like this
    When I say I give 100%, by that i mean.. im always a person who is there for a friend..at any hour of day..be it any situation..be it any kind of support..
    Yes I agree with you that always giving and rarely recieving results in resentments.. Im honest as friend means..i dont lie to my friends ,I never fake stories or never lie to them.. im always there..and i make sure im there..because i know thw pain of being left alone by friends.. 🙁
    im sorry if i wasnt clear.. i will try to explain more if you want
    God Bless

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